Depression: don’t want to deal, don’t want to feel. Nothing. Just want it to go away. Feeling. Emotion. Love. I want to push it out of me. Down some rocky shore. Out into an ocean, an abyss anything to swallow this pain, make it gone, disappear. Be dead.
Not living. Not trying to. Just breathing, just beating, just thinking. Hate and anger. At me. I despise myself. I despise this life, this nothing. This pain. Accepted by no one, loved by no one, am no one. Empty. Shallow. Weak. Where is the purpose to live in that?
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