and if each of us are doomed to continue like this, fuck it
“find a hobby” when you’re tired of doing that, then what?
“take a nap” I can’t nap forever. what do you want me to do?
“its not your fault” yeah well when your human incubation system fails you and you face stretching your vagina for a dead baby you come back and try saying that again
Basically I am in a bad situation. I don’t have anybody around for any kind of a support system and I don’t want to call some hotline. I am dealing with depression, abuse, and suicidal thoughts quite often and I am stuck alone. Most of the time I’m not allowed to leave the house because I’ve supposedly  done something wrong. I don’t think I’ll be ending my life anytime soon but I might end up giving in if my situation doesn’t change. Anyone have any advice?
I never knew any good. abuse from birth. Physically, menilly, sexually, and verbally. Living in poverty getting fucked by my dad and abused by my mom. Than my brother too. No love and no support. No friends no family. And the foster care system was no differnt. Abusse, neglect, and being used. I ran away at 12 and started prostituting to support myself. I wanted to make something for myself, to become something. I have been through things you couldn’t amagen. Things that should have killed me. But I’m hear and suffer every minuet of every day. I contiplate subside constantly. What do I […]
We lie all the time. Some do it to avoid hurting others, or being a bother to others, or because you just can’t trust anyone anymore. The most common lie is “I’m ok.” We all know we aren’t ok. And for me at least it hurts more each time I have to pretend that I’m full of sunshine and shit rainbows. The truth? I’m not alright. I’m not ok. Hell, I’m not even stable. I keep hearing things, and kinda seeing things. I know the manager is sitting in his office watching the live security feed from where I am, making sure I don’t screw […]
I tried to do it about 3 days ago. I tried to take my own life. It was a situation where it should have happened, and I was prepared for it. I had written all my notes to everyone who would have cared and I cleaned my room so it wouldn’t be a hassle afterwards. I was ready and I did it. I drank bleach until I couldn’t take it. I knew the end was near and my peace would soon come. But my peace never came. I woke up the next morning drowsy and in pain. But 3 days have now passed and the […]
My counselor asks me what I’m going to do when my mother is gone. Â Then I’ll be on my own and I’ll be forced to learn how to be viable outside the womb… haha.
I make hints at my true intentions, but she doesn’t seem to pick up on them. Â All she knows is that it will be tough. Â I told her that there would be nothing, but perhaps I think differently than other people. Â Nothing to me signifies blackness. Â I will neither see nor feel.
It’s the only choice given the circumstances. Â Nobody can spare me from being stuck here the rest of my life. Â So […]
Everyone just works their asses during Jr. High and High School so the can get good grades and go to college. Then once they’re in college, everyone works their asses off so they can get good grades and graduate and get a good job. Then everyone works their fucking asses off in their jobs so they can make money. Then once they have money they buy a big house but they can never come home to it, can they? That’s right because they’re too busy working their asses off to afford that house and cleaning ladies and putting their kids through school even though their […]
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