Sometimes I physically cannot talk, I build up words into something huge in my mind and I try to speak but just can’t at times. This usually happens when someone higher up in the social hierarchy of my school greets me, just a simple ‘hello’ pulls me into this panic and I try to reply and I open my mouth and I feel myself sweating and no sound comes out at all, even though the ‘hi’ is on the tip of my tongue and I know that it won’t matter in just a short while. It scares me because it’s rude not to smile and […]
Tag:
Tip Of My Tongue
She told me to get the rant out. Say all things that you keep telling yourself over and over quietly. Half of them, you won’t even mean or believe. Then talk to her. My mom. That’s all I ever want to do is sit down and talk to her. Have a conversation. In the past five years I’ve cut, made myself throw up, started smoking pot, drinking excessively and ending up in the hospital. I don’t know what I am doing or even why. I am impulsive like my father.
No one knows. My sister calls me psycho, I forgive her. But maybe I am. The […]