what is the purpose of life? i have found myself asking this question alot in the past year and haven’t found the answer. i wonder why some people fight to stay alive, while others fight to get out of it. i know the majority of people who commit or try to commit suicide have a chemical imbalance of some sort and their brain reacts to situations differently. but at the same time there are people out there who have experienced horrific things and yet want to live. why does a 89 year old want to live and a 14 year old want to die? the brain is miraculous thing especially when it come to emotions. emotions can make a person feel like they have physical problems but yet its only cognitive. emotions also lead us down dark hallways that we cant escape and feel the need to end ourlives in order to see the light again. i guess what im saying is that i find it fascinating on how people react to stressors in their lives. two people could experience the same tramatic event and one of them kills themself. why is that?
I ask these questions bc it makes me think about my life. i have been dealing with depression for 8 yrs and when i think i have overcome all the bumps and cracks im back where i started. down that same old dark hallway. maybe its true once a person has been to the edge they will never fully recover. so i ask this of myself almost everyday: Do i want to live life knowing that i will have to battle my emotions for the rest of my life and have frequent trips down this dark hallway? or do i want to end it and leave all the crap that has built up? decisions, descisons. oh i suppose people would be sad and hate me for my selfish act, but its almost selfish of them for wanting me to stay when im in pain. i just dont know what i should do.
3 comments
You are not alone, vbenja.
I’ve been asking the same question, in fact, just this evening..it’s funny, ‘cuz I’m discussing this with my mother..
now you might be thinking of how lucky I am still can discuss these kind of things with even my mother. and true, in so many ways, I do feel the utmost grateful, because now this website (& all the very painful stories inside) has somewhat opened my eyes to be more grateful, because there are so many, so many people that have much much worse and painful life!
but perhaps you’ll be surprised when I said that no my response doesn’t stop only until that point, ie: feeling grateful, lucky and all.
you see…Life is funny…no, actually, people ARE ‘funny’…and I certainly don’t mind funny in terms of like a clown, or something like that (hence I said ‘funny’)
it’s true, like you said so well, that also makes me wonder, about the 89 year old still wants to live, and 14 year old wants to end his/her life.
sure, I can always answer the easiest way: it’s because the 14 yr old is still not mature enough, and hence prone to make wrong judgements and decisions, unlike the 89 year old, and that the 14 year old still have chemical or emotional imbalances, or something like that, like you said too.
but I don’t know…I somehow feel that it’s NOT that simple.
heck, if there’s anything I’ve learned, also from this website, is that people are NEVER that simple.
People are DIFFERENT.
I guess this is why it seems like a new ‘revelation’ to me, of why there are so many people from the *advanced* countries like U.K, U.S (America,..the supposed land of DREAMS for sooo many people in third world countries!!) who shockingly commited suicide, although they’re much much more well-off and probably have so many things that only third-world & developing countries (like myself here, in Indonesia) can only dream off having!….
or take a look at Japan.
for some strange particular reasons, it has always been my ‘dream’ country too, yet, that country has one of the HIGHEST suicide rates there!
even much much much more than any numbers of suicide (we’re not talking of natural death, or death by diseases, illness, etc) in developing countries!
in fact, a more funnier thing I’ve observed: you go into one most remote village, cast away from all the *advanced society* like America, U.K ,…and you’ll suddenly find out that people there live VERY HAPPILY!
and you know what……..I think I’ve found the answer…suddenly it feels like an ‘eureka’ moment.
you want to know what is the answer?…
the Answer , IMHO, is this:
TECHNOLOGY AND ADVANCED ECONOMY IS NOT NECESSARILY THE ANSWERS!
in fact, it can KILLS people more than we think! proof: just look at how many sad, tragic stories of people here in this website want to commit suicide, mostly coming from the most ADVANCED countries like U.K, U.S (America), despite they’re living in a place where soooo many people in the rest of the world can only DREAM of living there!
but there’s something, *something* that these seemingly backward & so-left-behind remote villages have, that many modern advanced countries & society nowadays don’t have:
it’s called LOVE.
and we’re talking about genuine, pure love.
People still saying hi, and asking how are you, and actually DO really care,
instead of the superficial “how are you” then pitching the insurance sales or advertisements or whatever so abundant in modern, advanced society!!
People still really CARE for each other. pay a visit to his/her neighbor once in a while.
People in those remote villages still SHARE THEIR FOODS together,
without ANY judgemental of “fair” and “unfair” !
they just SIMPLY SHARE, and LOVE one another,
treating ’em kindly, as if they instinctively know that these other people are also VALUABLE, they are PEOPLE.
And the elderly, the village leader, is chosen by the common, ordinary people, and instead of using his power/status to corrupt more things and be damn greedy, backed by the riches and corrupts, this village leader actually do CARE so FONDLY, from his heart, to his FELLOW CITIZENS.
He view these people respectfully, as he KNOWS & realized that these people have entrusted their dreams, hopes, into these elderly figures.
and when the elderly wants to make any big major decision, he will consult with the villagers, it’s basically PEOPLE-to-PEOPLE.
no fucked-up hierarchy, bureucracy and system that is so corrupted like what’s happening in so many advanced countries nowadays.
Money and status is NEVER the answer !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Otherwise,….ask yourself this: WHY on earth there are so many fucked-up things running around in this so-called ‘most advanced, modern’ society & civilization? ……..because we’re living in a FAKE, SUPERFICIAL society that ironically we’ve *CREATED* ourselves….
We have drifted FAR from the ‘true-est, pure-est’ things that we, as *normal* human beings, have always KNOWN deep deepest inside each our every heart!!
look at how far & fucked-up this so-called ‘modern’ world has turned and went into…..
we are soooooo FAR from those ‘pure, sincere, honest’ things that still exist in -funnily- those remote villages that so many ‘modern’ people will quickly judge as “LESS competitive, less civilized, less intelligent, less educated, yada yada yada”.
No, it’s the ADVANCED countries that have gone WRONG !!!!!!!!
they ARE fucked-up !!!!!
when are these so-called ‘modern’ people/society want to WAKE UP and realized this truth????
if only they want to be damn HONEST to themselves,…then perhaps they can right-away find the answers as quickly as I’ve found this ‘revelation’…
but NO.
too many of so-called ‘modern, advanced’ countries people are now drowned in a fuckin’ FAKE, SUPERFICIAL entertainment, FAKE system, FAKE criteria/measure of SUCCESS, FAKE love, etc etc.
It is the FAKE-NESS THAT DRIVES SO MANY PEOPLE SO STRESSFUL,
AND MANY EVEN COMMIT SUICIDE!
WE ARE ALL CAPABLE OF KNOWING THAT, IF WE WANT TO BE REALLY HONEST,
CAN’T WE (MODERN PEOPLE) REALLY SEE HOW FUCKED UP AND FAR-AWAY WE’RE GOING FROM THE TRUE THINGS THAT REALLY MATTERS ????????????????????????????????????????
(I’m going to post this in a new thread,
because I feel that this sudden ‘eureka/revelation’ moment is so important to share to all people here. it’s perhaps *something* that can make them at the very LEAST, realized what went wrong & fucked-up with the ‘society’ they’re living in that makes them want to commit suicide)
It’s a pointless question. It’s like trying to fathom out the universe. Only a true idiot would say he has any answer to that question. You can only answer that question for yourself, no-one else. Each individual life is very personal and nothing like another’s, your perspective on life is unique – hence why some love live, some hate it and others are somewhere in-between.
Hence why more often than not people are yelling at each other on here, ultimately because they are not hearing what they want to hear – bingo! Only YOU have the answers for YOU, no-one else. If you find some joy in another’s perspective of life, it’s only because you are similar. You cannot find a ‘revelation’ from something someone else says to you, they are merely telling you what you already know, you just forgot it, or buried it.
you have many strong points and revolations about why advanced socities have higher suicide rates then undeveloped ones. it made me think about our (U.S) values.
Most younger Americans are caught up in “who’s who”. meaning that we are so focused on celebraties and their problems then whats going on in the world. We loose ourselves in how to look, how to act and what the “norm” is. the sad part is that we brought this upon ourselves. WE ARE SO FOCUSED ON INADIMENT OBJECTS THAT WE FORGET WHAT IS IMPORTANT AND THATS SELF WORTH AND SOCIAL ACCEPTENCE.
I agree with your points but now my question is how do we change these problems? Sure by social awareness, but that only does so much. how does a person go about changing the way we see ourselves and others? change has to happen especially in america b/c right now our ethnocentric views are blinding us from what is important.
Also another point i have to make is that: we can write about our opinions ans views on why things are the way they are. but nothing is changing. nothing will change if no one takes a step forward.
im not saying im going to be that person, (maybe) but things will continue and just be the same for people, if no one steps up and promotes social change.