Just talking to myself

February 17th, 2009by anapurna

Sometimes just to write – not to have worry about you knowing who I am helps. I don’t share my struggle…I have tried and not found understanding. Am i walking through a valley of death? I don’t think I am suicidal – but i am depresed and sometimes I just wish I would fall asleep and never wake up from it. i am not preaching to anyone I ant to make sure you know this for I do believe in God and yet I feel forsaken – I feel so alone. I just finished two history classes and the grade for both classes was an A – our papers got graded weekly and every week when I got good grades I would not be happy for I was sure the next week i would reqlly mess up and say something stupid – I received nothing but affirmation and I feel like this – I don’t know why….tears are streaming down my face and I look for hope, I look for the ability to make a resolution and stick to it…I need you God, I need you to walk with me and teach me how to live and how to enjoy life – I feel without friends – I don’t feel that anybody loves me.. the one problem in my life is overwhelming me and swalling me up.

anapurna

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