Hi,
I hope that someone will be able to help me.  I feel I can’t tell anyone anything and trapped. I had a child by a gay man. My daughter is beautiful, and I don’t regret having her. Now, that I see him come by the house more often it’s usually nice, but there’s one thing that is making me angry. He has a nice boyfriend who comes over, but I see the two of them kissing in front of me. His boyfriend used to be me kissing him, taking showers and baths with him, and going out doing things together.  You get the picture. My self esteem has gotten so bad that I’m tired of living this way everytime my ex boyfriend and his lover come over I feel he should have left me where he found me. I also had a bad relationship with another guy that I met through my ex boyfriend and found out his stepmother and he plotted to get me pregnant. I feel like everyone is a bad person. When I graduated high school, I thought about settling down and having kids. Now, I live with my exboyfriend’s parents who have been very supportive on this bumpy road. Any questions or comments would be helpful. Hope comes all who need it. Please help me.
Thanks,
Desperate
6 comments
I’m sorry for all the pain your going threw at the moment and I wish I could find a way or a set of words that will take your pain away. But all I have to offer is an ear and some small bits of advice. I’m no professional at pain, I myself am suicidal and have attempted it. what I am thoe is one of the few human beings that seam to care for others these days just cus they can. but back to my point I’m happy that you have a daughter. I’m young but even I wish for a loving wife and beutiful daughter. and as for your ex boyfreind its just bullshit that he’s putting you threw that. he knows dam right what kind of pain he’s cauising you but he won’t even put in the extra effort to not bring his partner around. u don’t need that but I do understand you child needs a father. I get it if you think all men are just assholes but there are good men out there that dream of a woman like you. I’m not sure if I helped but if u ever feel the need to talk to someone my emails bigdamb3ar@aim.com. help is out there and it will come, even if its just alittle at a time.
Sorry to hear about the family plotting to get you pregnant. There are a lot of crazy people in this world who disregard others feelings. Perhaps if it is bothering you could bring it up in discussion when alone with him and basically tell him the truth that it is hurting your self-esteem and that it has nothing to do with his partner. I know it might be difficult to do so, but I think you might end up storing all that anger and unleashing it on them one day and that would probably be worse. I’m glad that the parents are supportive so you always have something to fall back on when times are tough. Don’t give up hope, there are decent people out there, perhaps you just have to put up a guard to sort out the genuine people from the malevolent. I hope things can turn around for you and I wish you and your daughter all the best.
Leave that house. You r hurtn yourself know its easy to say and hard to do. But u hve to think about ur child and being a strong example for her. Things will get better for u. And when u do leave let him know who he can and cnt bring with him. At least til u r ready
Wow that is really messed up. I don’t think you have anything to worry about in the self esteem department. I haven’t had a girlfriend in over a year so I know how lonely it gets.
There are some lovely people out there. That I can promise. I’m not sure how much help I can be to you, but what I can say is that you need to start by building up your own self esteem. You must speak with your ex and tell him that all this is damaging you and could end up damading your daugter too. You must also try and get out, socialize more. Then you’ll meet other people and they’ll see that you’re wonderful and you’ll see that although there are some rubbish people out there, there are also people who actually care.
Don’t give up.
All my love for you and your daugher. Jack. x
What is making you feel trapped? Your feelings for your ex, your living situation, or something else?