Am I seriously considering this again??

  January 13th, 2010 by AspoonfulOFsammy

I’ve been here, done this…. but I keep finding my way back to the thoughts of death. I have attempted twice, both (obviously) without success thanks to being “saved” both times. I was in my teens when I tried before… I’m 20 now. I know I’m not old or wise, but these thoughts…. they come back all the time. They’ve been pelting my mind for 7 years. I think about dying at LEAST once a day, sometimes only for a fleeting moment…

Before, I tried with pills. This time, I think if I do it, I’ll hang myself. I did that on accident when I was about 7, and I remember passing out quickly. I would think the worst part would be the period of time before you pass out, which really, doesn’t seem all that bad to me, since I’ve experienced it before…

That’s the scariest part. The only thing stopping me is what this would do to anyone around me…. and my fear that no one would care.

God I’m fucking pathetic. Awesome.

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