iPods

I recently thought about killing myself. I just recovered from lyme which was a near death experience seeing as i was blind for a year  and in a wheelchair for three months. I just cant think of a good way to go. Im 22 and my iPod seems to be the thing saving me. Whenever i go to the hosptial i bring it and listen to “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds” and “Use Somebody”.  While other people here have serious problems i just cant get over the fact that i have the choice to die and others dont so many people need help but most of us here could be okay its the people that die of illness and starvtion that I worry about. I  dont want to die but i think i should which is why i keep my iPod with me just to tune out that horrible voice that says”you dont deserve to live”.