well im new to this site, but things keep getting harder and harder and i never seem to catch a break. ive been depressed for 2 years and have finally seeked help, im on 2 diffrent anti depressions that dont work. it has gone from abusement. to me mistreating pills and alcohol .then a girl who i loved just lead me on now i feel like killing myself i dont see a reason to live any more. theres no point i have no one and have nothing to live for …..anyway give me some feed back maybe itll help.
6 comments
Start walking. It may help your mood. Exercise is a proven mood enhancer. Try to be around Nature..I would have killed myself many times over if it were not for animals. I am an animal rights activist…I rage at people and the cruelty of people. They used to say that depression is anger turned inwards..that may be true. Turn it out in a constructive way and it may make you feel better. It does me. There are a lot of us on facebook…we also do not eat animals, and we feel much better. There are a lot of hormones in meat and the animals are terrified before death..that terror is released in a hormone that goes into human tissue when consumed. Just thoughts for you to ponder.
mate last week I told a girl I loved her and two days later she was barely speaking to me…it was like having my heart torn out and I mean the pain really was awful I felt sick every day and just generally awful…but things are getting a lil better now I was very close to suicide this time but believe it or not I went to youtube and started watching some videos and saw a guy who inspired me and yeah I’m still not 100% yet but I’m piecing myself back together…now I’m thinking hold on I still haven’t gone abroad I haven’t learnt japanese I haven’t did this and that…it’s about the little things try to center your life around them and I totally agree with connee I do jogging, well mostly walking I’m not the fittest haha, and it does help my mood 🙂
Cloud34156,
I am reading a really great book called “The Last Lecture”. It is not a long book, but truly inspiring and has some really great life lessons. I myself had a really crappy growing up..my father died in front of me before I turned four, my big sister was like my mom and she left home to get married when I was 5, my brother, was mentally ill and he died at a young age….last year I lost both of my brothers, a couple years before, lost one of my sisters. My ex-husband cheated on me my entire marriage and I had to move 2000 miles away to feel safe (he and his bros threatened my life) On May 27, 2010 my precious son took a gun and blew his brains out. We never even knew he was depressed..in fact, happier than he had ever been in life. So, why do I keep going? Life is worth the fight…life is a precious amazing gift! I get love not from people..never found that reliable. I have some amazing animals in my life and it is a privilege to be in their presence. To share their lives. I have a really nice husband, who is disabled now and is with me in every fight from health care for everyone to animal rights..he is with me. Life is far from perfect, but I think I have had everything…just not all at once. I tried to kill myself once, my best friend called and was alarmed when I told her I loved her over and over…she sent the police and they pumped my stomach at the hospital. I was angry that I did not die, at first, but a stranger told me to think of the people that I would hurt if I died. I did, and that feeling passed. I had it again when I hurt my back and had to have surgery and my active life changed dramatically. I am rejoining a gym to help keep me from depression because I miss my son so much and have so many regrets…but I cannot tell you how much I loved him and his smile and laughter..they tickled my heart! To think I will never hear that sound and I have to live the rest of my life without the most beautiful sound I have ever heard…well, it is hard. My heart aches a lot. But, I still laugh and hear his laughter in my head and heart. I have a lot of living to do for him now…since he cannot. Read the book, if you can. It is inspiring and that is what we need when we feel down..inspiration and love..love comes from different places, not the ones you think. My son was studying French…so I am going to learn French for him! 🙂
Connee,
What a tragic story, but my god, I cannot believe what a strong woman you are. You are an inspiration for those around you. You are an example of someone who perservered, through many difficult, traumatizing obstacles. Keep your faith that life will offer you something worth living for, and remember you are loved, especially by your son, who watches over you everyday.
-Misguided Ghost
misguided ghost..
Today is the day my son was to have been married. I will never see the look on his face of happiness and delight as he looks at his bride in her dress. Next year on this very day, i will bury his ashes under a dogwood tree and the rest I will throw in the river where he fly fished. He was a fine fisherman.
There will be no dance of mother and son on this day. He was moving here and I was turning a building that I have into a really cool house for him….you should see the magnificent log house I built for him with my own hands, with rock floors and a waterfall and soaring ceilings 27 feet tall…walkin showers and a library loft. I filled it with antique fishing lures and creels and things…elk skins and deer skin chairs. I have always kept a bulldog for him..the one I have now, Callie, is just over a year old. Always had one waiting for him when he came to live. I have a pet buck, a white tailed deer named Jack..he loved deer he will never be able to know his pet deer. A house that is all that he wanted as a boy..and every man loves it.
I spent the last thirteen years building it for him and furnishing it with leather couches and antiques and cool artwork. He will never live in it. I will have to see his dance in the sway of the oaks and the river birch, feel his cheek in the gentle river breezes, see his sparkling eyes at night in the constellation of stars…and always, always, always ask the night sky..why?
Why didn’t he reach out his hand and say I need your help, Momma. He knows that I would have given him the moon, as well…but with all the love he had, no one could stop him from putting that gun in his mouth that day….he had even asked God for help in his journal…so the darkness got his body and his life. Do you think God got his soul?
The word is “sought” not “seeked”. Are you foreign or just an idiot?