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Greetings I Have read some of your letters and wish to add my story to the share. I am a dreamer of death. I have prayed for it daily. I have tried poison (threw up and went to school the next day) Pills woke up 2 days later in the same place. Bad lifestyle choices.
I once did die but not from a try but an allergic reaction at 17 I was so angry that I had been brought back. I decided there was a job for me to do before I was going to be allowed to pass over. I have tried to live every day that way since and I pray every day for death.
But here I am a mom of 2 grown sons working 60+ hours a week just to get by. Body is getting unreluctant to do what I could when I was young. Today i’m thinking of putting my gun to my head but know how many people will be hurt or angry.
I tried their pills for depression several times, in my 20’s I called them pills for other people as they made me keep the abuse and pain inside so I didn’t bother other people with my problems. The last round in my 40’s made me even sadder and very lethargic. I gave all of the up several years ago still am depressed but am more functional.I have spoken with several drs. and was once even told to forget my past.
 I love the earth and see its beauty.I am giving of what I can and work as a healer of people. I am loved by my friends and I am sure irritate many others.
For now I will get ready for work I’m needed there even thought the job is stressful,the pay sucks and I work overnight, I am making someone elses life better.