Well let’s just put it this way, for a while now I havn’t been feeling like myself. Actually for the past month or so. And I’m starting to change in a bad way. I used to love hanging out with friends and my boyfriend and family. but now days all I want to do is sit in my room alone and do nothing but stare at a blank television screen. I’ve lost intrest in a lot of things I loved before. Like my favorite thing to do is bake. I love it, it’s peaceful, yet takes a lot of time and energy if you do it all by scratch like myself.
I always used to smile when i’m upset. but now I dont even try to hide it. I have been pushed beyond my anger level so many times by so many people my emotions shut down after a while when i get past my point now. Like I feel nothing. no anger, sadness, happiness. nothing.
And I’ve been thinking these thoughts for a while now, maybe a month or so. I don’t really seem to be getting any happier no matter what i do or anybody else does. Reality hurts now, friends dont help, and it hurts me even worse when i get so frusterated and depressed i snap and ***** at my family memebers, because later on I regret it and know they did nothing wrong. So I’m just trying to understand. I dont like going to councelors for help like my friend told me to do, I kinda blew it off, they dont help in my view. So is there anything I can try to do to make myself happier for the time being until I can try to find some help for this issue? I can’t stand not being happy anymore, it exhausts me so much, I havn’t eaten in a few days because my stomach isn’t up for food when I’m depressed.
But any advise is welcome.