..I am no one,
but then again ‘I’ or ‘We’ can never be i am or that..we are everything and nothing
if i may speak in conventional terms than allow me to introduce my self ..
I am a male 25 year old Turkish Cypriot who lives in the uk, i am as they say a “tragic romantic”..a true Goth at heart but i just don’t look like one..a walking contradiction who doesn’t make any sense in an insane and absurd world.
I am a hardcore Nihilist which wasn’t my choice at all,this has caused me allot of pain throughout my life.. think that i have always sensed knowing about Emptiness and sheer Nothingness of everything from birth all through my life which puts one in a state of extreme isolation and gives one a clear view and understanding of life’s purposelessness
my life and myself has just been one gigantic fuck up! which i see no point in writing about here, i tried to commit suicide once when i was 16 but did not succeed due to my inexperience and fucked up severely.
i sometimes think it is a miracle that i have reached 25… i wish to eventually end my life by my own hands. which i sense is coming soon, i listen to allot of different types of music black metal mostly,Gothic, i love Super Bikes, Women, Shemales, i practice Muay Thai, Ninjutsu, and do allot of other shit to pass the time.
i don’t know what else to write as it will be gone & forgotten in a few posts anyway.
i come to this site which is just a black hole.. and it makes me even more depressed as i read what people are going through or have been through and i cant do shit to help.
i am no one special, i am just another mediocre human being who should never have been fucking born.
Human Garbage if i may. Nothing,Becoming more and more pathetic and losing my dignity,
..Emptiness Of Inherent Existence..the nature of all phenomena..~~Gautama Buddha~~
Â
11 comments
is that you in the photo? also, thanks for the reply.
and i know what you mean about this site being a big black hole. its so dark and almost brings any dark feelings you may not have known you had to light.
but in another sense it makes you feel welcome and alike. it makes you feel normal. and when i say you, i mean me. anyway, im sure your not garbage!
Its me,
I am where the loneliest souls gather
Though I remained all alone
But may these moments be eternal
May this dark yet starlit sky shine on me
..Forever..
In perspective, garbage are those who cheat, lie, and take advantage(of children, humans, animals)trifficing humans, selling drugs to ignorance, so why would you lower yourself to that level? You can’t tell me that you’re just the same as they are. However I understand the concept of Garbage, I myself think I’m filth, and I know why too.
hey, whats your name?
also, check out Forgotten Tomb- Entombed by winter, black metal that keeps me sane.
Your words are much appreciated, than you both.
Hattie my name is Sena,
so what is your story ? tell me about you or yourserself i wish to know
i like your picture you look nice on the inside
you are not garbage my grandfather is hes molested people in my family and murder a lot of people we even believe he killed his own son
so i know your not that
i also wish i was never born but we were so there must be stuff out there for us
~Thank you for your reply and your words of support, it is very appreciated. and also that you would tell such personal albeit abhorrent things about your life with a complete stranger, thank you for sharing.
I hope you will eventually find peace from the terrors that this life holds for all of us.
Greetings
your welcome honestly it not my story its my familys lol but your welcome anything i can do to help and that makes my shitty day seam a lil bit better thanks 🙂
we can fight this fight a little easier with each other i guess. well, if you call laying half alive as life itself beats you mercilessly a fight…
sena hey…..
i promise you DONT want to know my story.. honestly i dont even have one. im just a general person, nothing special what so ever. nothing overly tragic in my life. i just hate it. i dont know. i guess i would call myself depressed, but hey, why label.
breifly… im a 17 year old girl, im going into year 12 in 2 months, and i live in australia, i have blond hair blue eyes, i go to a private boarding school. i have 2 sisters and a brother, and a pet dog, daisy. i only live at home for 3 days every 8 weeks, apart from summer holdiays (right now) and whenever im not here i miss it. and whenever i AM here i promise myself i will never miss it again because its hell. yep.
apart from all this ^^ whats your story..?