I know that I will do it eventually, I’ve already had one attempt. I’m terrified of being sent back to the psych ward I was in if I survive, which is why I must NOT survive. If I combine a few methods then it’ll (hopefully) reduce the chance of survival. I hate summer (I’m Australian). Every time I think of surviving I come close to having a panic attack, life can’t go on, but death doesn’t come so easily when you want it. This sucks. This is hell.
11 comments
Im there.. I know im gunna do it eventually, attempted before, Ive been in the psych ward, and Im terrified of surviving too. I even developed a eating disorder because I wanted to be physically weak so there was less chance of me surviving.
You’re not alone in this situation even though were on opposite ends of the world.
Hey hun i live in australia too i think i’ve spoken to you before it fucken hot here hey! Yeah i know what you mean im terrified of screwing it up i wish i knew that’d id deffinantly succeed i would’ve done it already the thought of killing myself and it not being too brutal and succeeding is the only thing that keeps me goin makes the days bareable knowing that i could just end it all i love that thought it makes me happy and feel calm but as soon as i start to think of my family and what im gonna do to them and screwing it up badly and being left worse off i start to panic real bad it really brings up my anxiety sooo annoying i cant fucken win what a bloody nightmare wish i could just dissapear!
Hi useless, I am new to this sit but not new in TRYING to killmyself. My spelling is shit so sorry. The doc’s have said that I was dead but came back now 3/4 times. You dont need to hear about my shit. Why to you think you are useless? I would like to have a place where all the people that want to leave the earth can come and stay because as far I can tell must off the people that want to leave are the people that this world needs to help it to be a better place for us all to live. Must people run around trying to look after number 1 and make life shit for anyone how is not. I have given myself 3 weeks to live because some stuff I need to sort out. I think this time it will work. I dont feel useless just on the wrong the wrong world or out of time with people. If you want to talk : I know you might be pissed off talking to youreself or others by now? But if not my let me know because feeling useless just Dose not feel right to me. This world trys to get the good people with good hearts to leave.
darkloner74 i relate to you. The only thing that makes me feel a little better and somewhat in control of all that is happening to me is knowing that i can end it all by just killing myself. How old r u? Do you want to chat? Do you have a yahoo or hotmail account?
Family is another thing getting in the way too, but I’ve almost ‘learnt’ to detach myself from them. I feel so unreal a lot of the time.
@lala I’m 16 and female. I don’t have hotmail or yahoo but my email is lonerhell@gmail.com.
The loony bin doesn’t help much since you’ll be with people with conditions whereas depression and suicidal tendencies are not always conditions but mainly symptoms of a burned out life. It can get worse by being with other deranged people and by seeing how the human being can fuck up, DON’T GO THERE. However, seing a psychiatrist or psychologist 2 times a week will help you relax, say or scream what really bothers you in life, then you can start to put pieces of yourself back together. 😉
Darkloner my advise to you is really to let an adult around you know about how desperate and serious you are about trying to kill yourself again. I know they will help you get out of this.
Sometimes when we are in our teens and something bad happen to us we think it is the end of the world and it is permanent. Trust me it is temporary. There are solutions.
Talk to your mom and your dad. Do not detach yourself from them. They love you. They care for you. They will feel miserable and guilty for life if you purposely harm yourself.
You are so young!! whatever you go through it cannot be bad to the point that you need to kill yourself.
Talk to your parents…A few years from now when you think about this day…trust me you will be glad you did.
@lala: I don’t mean to sound mean or anything, but you don’t really know anything about me or what my life has been and is like. I have seen a counsellor for at least 4 years now. This isn’t some teen angsty crap that everyone thinks all teens go through, I have no friends, I have no life and I could go through the list of illnesses I have but I’d rather not. I appreciate your concern but please don’t tell me it’s a teenage thing, because it’s NOT.
darkloner well maybe you should try something new
have you look up what u have and what the best thing to make it better
maybe what your doing is just a bandgage that come off a lot and you have to put it back on you might need to find something that will sow it up and make it heel
do you get what i mean
yeah i know what you mean, but it’s not that easy. Besides, i’ve already made my mind up.
i did to when i was littel but thin something happened
dont u want to live a happy life like you deserve
there must be something that can keep you going