Hello how are you today?
I’m fine thanks
I’m lying I am not fine
I’m dying on the inside
I would tell them but they won’t understand
They will tell a story of a time when they felt sad
Its not the same.
I don’t just feel sad sometimes
I am sad
all the time
thats the only thing I am
Oh you just need a distraction
Just keep your mind off of those things
I tried
I tried friends and family
I tried alcohol, weed, LSD, cocaine, ecstasy, opium, shrooms, vicodin, tramadol, elavil, xanax, paxil…
what haven’t I tried
I’ve tried to make my mind believe it will get better
I’ve tried all the chemical happiness
The only thing left to try is suicide
16 comments
Yeah its a bit like that! How old are you?
just turned 21 last week
Oh okay im 23. You male or female?
female
Me too. Where you from?
US…Illinois
Im in Australia god theres hardly anyone on here from here you’s are all in like the u.s or u.k
Sorry i should’ve said happy birthday for last week! Did you have a good 21st?
Maybe Australians are just generally happier…or they haven’t found this site yet
Hmm maybe and i guess Australia’s not as big
Thanks, my 21st was good cause I got to go back home from college and just get wasted with one of my best friends. It was a good distraction
Well thats good im glad you had a good day
yea but the good days always seem the make the bad ones seem a lot worse than they really are
sigh I’m from IL too though I’m male and old enough to be your dad 🙂
which method are you going to use, sigh?
I had made a plan and wrote my letter and all that practical stuff. But something stopped me. I don’t know what it was. My plan was to take all my sleeping pills then cut my wrists open with an xacto blade and just bleed all night and my roommate would find me dead in the morning. I told my psych about it because I guess I wasn’t ready. Then friday night I cut my wrist just to see how much it would take to bleed. Apparently its not that easy. But I ended up liking the cutting so theres just one more thing to add to my addictions. I don’t think I will try the od thing though. I just want a way that I can’t fail at. I don’t wanna leave through a suicide attempt and face all the people after