Right now I’m 16. No, I’m not that melodramatic teen who thinks his life is falling apart beneath him, and no, I’m not having troubles coping with a major loss. I’m 16 in years, not miles. No, I’m no drug-addicted teen nor a a kid who can’t keep a C average in school. My grades are more than decent and my “official” problems are very few. But every last waking moment of my life has been wasted; I’m sure of it! The problem lies deep within me, and shows itself in every waking moment of my life.
When I wake up in the morning, I go about normal, daily routines just as anyone would but with the following knowledge: I probably won’t enjoy a single second of today and will only survive to tomorrow. I know a lot of people go through this routine daily, but others may at least have a decent group of people who care. I’d be lying if I said nobody cares at all; however, it doesn’t seem like anyone actually wants to listen. So far I’ve told two people of my suicidal impulses. One of them has had impulses of his own but has managed them since. I tried to talk to him but it’s hard because he seems only to want to give me advice, not actually listen. The other is trying hard to understand my situation…..but he can’t. Is there anyone out there who can understands?
5 comments
Hi, I know exactly how you feel. I feel like life is just a rerun every single day. Wake up go to school, come home, sleep, wake up……. Lather rinse repeat. I always catch myself asking why I can’t have an adventure, why my life isnt extraordinary? It seems like life is just something you have to juSt go through the motions to get through. If you want to talk here I am.
I can understand your position. How about talking to a doctor about your feelings?
I think the person giving advice, is telling you what he did to avoid/change his life. He may not be a good listener, yet based on what you did tell him, he has enough information to tell you about the actions he took.
I agree with alstare1974, if you need someone to listen seek out a proffessional, a doctor, or psycologist.
Sounds like your life has some blandness in it, what kind of things or activities do you do for fun ?
Exactly how I feel. I don’t even have reasons to be sad yet I never feel like my smile or laugh is real. It’s almost like i’m watching down on my life repeating its everyday routine, never living. I don’t even know if I want to live. Sometimes I sleep for days, because I think why not. There’s no point anymore.
Ryan, you really have to understand that normal people can’t cope with people telling them ‘I want to die’. That’s why you have to talk to a proffessional. It doesn’t mean they don’t care, or they’re a terrible person. They just can’t relate, so it’s no good talking to them because they will probably make you feel worse.