Today had been a rather uneventful day. It was long, boring and full of drama only known to those who remain in schooling. Started off ok, but the abysmal ending left me in tears. It started off with my friends and I going to the plaza to find some thing to eat and just look around. At six or so, a group of guys we didn’t know started to flirt with me and my friends. They asked us to go out with them. We had said no and walked away. We bumped into them later and found ourselves getting followed around the place. We tried to hide and get away from them, but they found us everywhere we went. Again and again, we had to tell them no, yet they wouldn’t listen. They talked to us for a good while. Then, they left.
We were scared that they had followed us. We didn’t want them to come to us again. I didn’t feel all that bad, but my friend was panicking. She was the main target of their advances. She seemed shaken up. I didn’t know what to say or do to make her feel better. I stood there just gazing off to the side. We were picked up and taken home soon after that. I got home.
An idea struck me. I decided to try and draw her a person from a TV show that she had liked. I used a picture of another drawing as my model for the drawing i was going to give her. I took four hours to draw the thing as best as I could. I scanned the photo and edited all the mess ups with my computer. It had turn doug rather good. It looked quite like the model I had originally used. I thought she would think nothing of it and just like the picture. I sent her the picture and awaited her reaction.
Alyssa later posted it on Facebook and said that she liked it a lot. Another of my friends noticed that it looked like the model and told her so. Alyssa found the model I used and said that I didn’t care about her and that I just edited the photo completely. I tried to convince her otherwise. I even showed her the original drawing I made. She would have none of it. She told everyone she knew that I was lying. That I had no skill as an artist, that I was full of shit, and that I was some stupid guy who would never ever be someone that was trustworthy. I knew that she meant everything she said.
In reply of what she said, a bunch of people asked her why she said those things. She told them her side of the story. Everyone sided with her, except Ashlyn, who was there when I drew the photo. Everyone decided to tell me a bunch of other things and voice their opinions on the matter. Others just flat out told me that they hated me and wished that I had gotten hurt by the guys that were following us. I couldn’t believe some of the things they said. I wanted to say stuff, but they would not listen to what I had to say.
They believed that they knew what was right, and what was wrong. Apparently I was what was wrong. I decided that if they would rather have me gone, then that was what they were going to get. I grabbed a knife from the kitchen and slit my wrist. The blood pureed out and I started to get light-headed. Everything became blurry. I only remember hearing Ashlyn come back in and scream. She rushed over to me and started calling my name. That was all I heard before I passed out.
That’s the last of what I remember before I woke up here, in the hospital. I’d rather not have to resort to that again. Though, I don’t know if I will ever be ok with what happened. I’ll try to get better, if only for Ashlyn’s sake. I mean what else is there to live for when everyone you know decides to hate you.
3 comments
School kids can always be so cruel, you seem like a great person. Your friend that sided with you clearly thinks so and she’s the type of person you want to be with, talk with her and ignore everyone else, they aren’t worth listening to. If they become annoying, walk away, don’t try to argue or try to with them, it is pretty much impossible. Hold on to Ashlyn. Spend time with her, school ends, and you’ll n we have to go back to that side of the bridge again, I personally only have one person I keep in contact from school. What they think is nothing and important, be yourself and keep strong, you’ll make it through. I’d suggest at school to either have headphones in when possible and when walking just look straight ahead and only think of your destination!!
In the n we part that was supposed to be “never” I have no clue why it did that. Also In going to add this site is an amazing resource and way to cope as well, come back ever so often, share and read. It always makes me feel a bit better no matter how bad I am doing.
Yeah, you’d be surpised how many of your “friends” at school are actually fake. But fuck ’em. Find people who are REAL with you. People who know exactly what you’re going through and will find ways to relate. Those are real friends. Fuck facebook too. It’s just as fake.