i am thirteen years old. I feel so wrong and depressed. I don’t know why. I just do. The only person thats ever truly cared about me has gone away. I have no one. No support. No nothing. I come home from school and cry my eyes out everyday. I don’t like doing this, but I can’t seem to change anything. As hard as I try I just turn out to be miserable at the end of the day. I want to kill myself. I have tried, only once. I was just so sick of being nothing to anyone. I still am. Everyday I fantasize about my death, of how it would be like with a world without me. Doesn’t change much, actually doesn’t change at all. I don’t have a therapist, like most people who are like me. I have no one to talk to, which is why I’m posting on here. I wish I could be happy. I cut, I have scars.. Not many you can see, but two that stand out so much. I hate them. I wish I had never done it, but I keep resorting to cutting everytime i get angry or upset with myself. I just wish this would end.
1 comment
Well tsxashleey this isn’t talking but until and while you find someone, more than one someone to trust and talk with in person there are folks here who have some understanding and insight (as I am confidant you will also find where you are also in time).
Cutting is serious so please seek out people who have cared so very much that they have worked hard understanding that particular pain – they exist.
How about your school, Boys and Girls club ? You are young enough that you can get financial assistance for counseling and support.
Exercise, music, (see post about trans fats) and many things to try. Bright colors good natural smells like flowers, rain, etc. can be soothing. Is there anything you like to do so much that you forget about pain for a moment or an hour?
You can be content … happy is not a constant state … it is a lot like sorrow, it is more rare than simple contentment.