completely alone

freaked 3/18/2012 - 9:13 pm

hello spark and im so sorry to hear your feeling this way!! Im new here just signed up tonight hoping to talk and be understood though it feels like i will nvr be wich makes it all worse unfortunately ive been suicidal since i was 8!! would love to talk to you or anyone for that matter that can at least say yea we have that in common!!

sparkeyes 3/18/2012 - 9:21 pm

we have that in common all right. if i could only find the pills my mom is hiding or find an object sharp enough i would be gone. we can definitely talk.

sparkeyes 3/18/2012 - 9:23 pm

i seriously should have gone to the pharmacy tonight and just bought my own pills, but i am out of money and was mesmerized by this terrible movie i was watching. i;m being picked up in 8 minutes and there is no way i can get there and back in time. i’m stuck in this awful time warp screaming silently

sparkeyes 3/18/2012 - 9:26 pm

distant.road usually always writes. i’m wondering if he is mad at me, because he hasn’t even written. i’m glad you wrote me freaked. i am feeling really really low. i’m really on the edge.

freaked 3/18/2012 - 9:34 pm

i get that it fucking sucks that it has to come to feeling the need to end our own lives especially in my situation where i have thought about it pretty much every day of my life since i was 8 i am now 26 still am no good for nothing but i think there is a way out of feelin suicidal just cant find it on my own and to scared to look for the help please please!!…a from the heart suggestion to you is just find someone you can feel comfortable talking to and talk it out with them i just want you to give life a chance it pains me to be on here and see all these comments about wanting to kill our selves people say you cant love others if you dnt love your self and thats not true at all its gods give to us to love one another and i will always have love for other people even strangers like you i think that keeps me goin i got people that just need my simple love but it dnt take a way the sadness and hatred i have for my own life but the thought of causing them pain because of my selfish suicidal act i just dnt know

distant.road 3/19/2012 - 1:12 am

I’m definitely not mad at you, sparkeyes… Not at all. I’ve responded a lot to your previous posts and I wanted to take a step back and let others respond with their ideas. It doesn’t seem like my perspective was helping you too much… and it’s too easy to sound like a broken record. That wouldn’t help you either. I do hope that you get the resources you need… and I hope that I can contribute something of substance. I truly care about you. You’re in my thoughts and prayers.

sparkeyes 3/20/2012 - 12:05 pm

you should give yourself more credit, distant.road, you’ve helped more than you think. i’m just a pretty complicated case.

ellachristina 3/19/2012 - 2:56 am

hey sparkeyes.:) I wish I could help too.:( I’m in a sad mood,and it’s hard to find the right things to say sometimes. but we do all care for you,and wish you the best! I know how it feels to feel like nobody cares,but we do! I’m always here if you want to talk. I’ll do my best to help. please don’t end your life! I’ve read some of our posts and you seem like a really good person. i’m so sorry for your pain,you deserve to be happy! please don’t give up!

@freaked-welcome to the site. 🙂 the people here are really understanding and nice,I’m glad you found the website.i hope we can help. I love what you said about love. lol.:) but,much love to you too!! *hug*
much love to you too sparkeyes! i’ll add you guys to my prayer list!! hang in there.

Footstepsinthesand 3/20/2012 - 12:14 pm

Complex cases are distat.roads speciality

distant.road 3/20/2012 - 1:28 pm

Thanks, sparkeyes. It’s good to see you… It’s been a few days. Complicated or not, keep moving forward… Keep that spark going.

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