I have tried to kill myself 6 times. Â I still cut. Â None of my friends have noticed a goddamn thing; all my family can do is make me feel guilty instead of trying to help. Â I told some of my friends but all they could do was tell me they hadn’t fucking noticed or give me callous advice. Â I just am so exhausted. Â I just want to go to sleep and never wake up. Â I’m unwanted. Â But I really don’t want to die in pain; my attempts were all with pills and did absolutely nothing. Â I’m just so sick of this. Â Why don’t I deserve people who actually care? Â Why doesn’t any of us deserve people who care?
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
12 comments
We all deserve people who care about us, but sometimes they’re tricky to find even if they’re right in front of us. Call me selfish, but I don’t want you to leave us.
1. You deserve people who actually care.
2. I know that sounds hypocritical and I wish I could say more, but I’m on here for a reason too…
Thanks, guys. But it just feels like everyone is always too busy for me, or just they don’t care enough to notice that I’m really not all there in class. And I tried so hard to be there for people but no one is willing to put in the same effort for me. And venom18, we’re all here for lots of reasons, I guess. But I just wish one person had said that they cared and that they wanted me alive when I still felt I could solve this.
We all are. To try and keep each other going through life. To make sense of it all. To love and take care of each other. Because we deserve it. ALL of us deserve it!
I think people just get so wrapped up in their own lives and with their own problems that they’re not very observant. If you have someone in your class that you want help from, try being honest and tell them you’re having a hard time. I know for me, it’s difficult to be honest with others about my issues, and it takes a lot of bravery to share.. but baby steps, right?
I mean I know–I feel that way about myself, which just makes me feel more guilty for being mad at others for not noticing my problems. But I tried telling 3 of my friends. One sort of helped and then dropped out of my life, more or less. Another tried to tell me how it wasn’t his fault he didn’t notice. The third tried to help, tries to help, but there’s not much she can do for me at this point.
I’m glad you have friends that have at least tried to help you.. I’m envious : )
Well, they mostly kind of just make things worse, but I know what you mean 🙁 and I’m sorry. Did it work when you told them what was wrong? I mean, at first, all I wanted was for someone to say they wanted me to live. But no one did. So it really wasn’t much help.
hey i can’t say i fully understand but if you wanna talk or ever just need someone to listen i’m here. i’m sorry that you have to go through stuff like this i’m sorry anyone has to but having someone to talk to is sometimes a big help.
I have some people who care but I no longer give a shit .. their words tend to enter one ear and exit the other
life’s often given me the opposite of what I desired or given me things when I longer wanted them .. as the years went by, I learned not to desire anything so FUCK LIFE
if given the choice btwn happiness & death, I’d choose death w/o a second thought
*no longer wanted
JCKristy: Thanks 🙂 I mean talking sometimes helps, but only really if you can verbalize what you’re feeling, which for me is kinda 50/50.
truthbetold: I know sort of how you feel. I don’t know that given that choice I’d choose death, but I just feel like real, consistent happiness is not so much a possibility anymore.