the only reason i haven’t offed myself is because the people around me keep pleading me not to. why? why do they care? my ex came to my house last night around 1 am because he was worried about me. He rang the doorbell and woke my parents, but luckily they went back to sleep. He walked to my house. At midnight. In the cold. why do they care? I was on the phone with him for 2 hours telling him to go home but he was refusing to do so until he was convinced that I was safe. I just want to be gone. let me be gone. let me disappear. I’m so fucking tired. I’m exhausted. let me sleep. let me rest. why am I living for other people. I don’t want to be alive, other people want me alive. That’s akin to letting a very sick elderly person die a painful death instead of respecting their request to pull them off of life support.
edit: please don’t bring religion into this, i really don’t want to hear it. the question was rhetorical.