I am new to this site and frankly I’m scared. I have struggled with thoughts of suicide on and of for years but the key word is struggled. I have been in a place where I am so numb that contemplating methods is all I do and it doesn’t feel scary but rather reassuring. However, it is scary that people come on this website not for help the fight for life but to discuss gruesome methods? I understand that for some who are in this place discussing it might make it seem more acceptable or real but for me it is a concept that I want to fight. Are there any people on this site who have not resolved to die despite the constant mental battle? Is there anyone who can fake some hope?
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
11 comments
Sorry, I’m stupid as all hell. As usual. I do think there is some actual hope around here…and people wanting to help – and I have seen your posts.
Actually I think there is a lot more hope here than it seems.
fake hope is all i got left
Hey sunshined I felt that way too about people discussing methods but for some it is reassuring to talk about some never carry out their chosen method but talking about it helps..I’ve been here on and off for about 8 months I’ve come close a couple of times but im hanging onto hope.I hope you can too. I’m not faking hope I truely believe I’m going to get through and daring to believe that is the first step.in the past ive felt numb and scared and all I could think about eas how to end it but now I’ve turned the corner.I do want to live and I’ve got a good dr and councillor behind me I hope you can find your way through feel free to email me take care now
Whats left to fight with?
I’m tired of fighting but I’m still here. I AM still fighting. I do have some hope but I really am just tired. So tired.
I want to live. I have also talked methods (not on here of course). I have panic attacks that turned into paranoia. Someday I know in the thralls of a panic attack I will do it. I also know that if it happened that way, it wouldnt even be by any chosen method, but a random frenzy of who knows what.
I got on meds the other day bc I had been in panic mode for too long. I was becoming concerned that I would become delusional. Are they working? If you read my older posts you will know that it is. Stll hate the meds, for me it’s a horribletrade off. But my thoughts have slowed down so that I’m not in constant panic mode.
Well are not all in the same place but we can all relate. That doesn’t mean ppl don’t want help. It means they really need help. Please don’t make assumptions about us. Read my last post from yesterday if you like.
@ molly good for you!
I qot fake hope!
Thank you for your responses I have been looking for posts that I can relate to because a lot of them were just frightening to me. I know when I am suicidal the last thing I need to read about is a pain free method because that will only tempt me more. I hope a lot of what I read last night was a way for people to cope rather than egg other people on with their plans. I will keep looking for posts that I can relate with that are more focused on the fact that despite the self hate we must continue…
Why must we continue?
I have hope
Real hope
But it wasn’t always that way for me…