Losing Care

“What’s the point of searching for happiness when the road is never ending and painful?”
There isn’t a point. Finding happiness in a world where it is so rare and elusive is practically impossible, not to mention a waste of time in most cases.

“If I am so good then why do I feel so empty? Why do I long to feel that girl on my shoulder? Why do I long to do more?”
That ’empty feeling’ is depression. It freaking sucks. You long for a girlfriend because thats just how society has programmed it into our heads. We all ‘need’ to have a significant other; without one, we are ‘nothing’. But you know what, fuck society. Listen to what people are telling you. Don’t stop being sweet and caring. Girls really appreciate guys with those qualities.

“But yet why do I feel myself losing care for all these questions to be answered?”
Again, that would be depression. I would suggest ways to get through depression, but A) I’m struggling with it myself and B) you made a perfect statement – dying is alot cheaper than getting help. Can’t really argue with that.

“I learned after looking it up online that the only way to not be rejected is simply not to try at all.”
That’s absolutely true. In fact, I don’t try and I rarely have to deal with rejection. But then there is the whole aspect of never taking risks and not going anywhere in life other than where you are right now.

I’m sorry that this is a bit scattered and confusing, not to mention slightly hypocritical on my part, but after reading your post I was amazed with how much I could relate to it and had to reply. Good luck with everything. 🙂