Im Broken.

The two things that have kept me pushing threw life are my dogs. Sad isnt it? Scotty and Sky .

Ive had sky for 7 years. Ive had scotty for 3. They where best friends. We where best friends. I cried with them, loved them, played with them. I always turned to them when things got bad. They loved me.

Well Guess what happened on Friday the 6th ? My poor little girl Sky got hit by a car. Shes gone. I dont know what to do or how to feel. Ive never lost anybody close to me before and i gotta tell you, it really hurts. I know she was “just a dog” but every time i cut or wanted to kill myself i looked into their big eyes and i knew that i had to live for them. Now my poor baby Scotty is alone. He cries all night, hes by himself during the day, he has no one to play with. He doesnt eat, hes basically depressed. Its been 6 days? I dont know, but he still looks for her in all her sleeping places and all the places she loved to go. I miss her soo much. I dont know if i can keep myself contained. I literally cry everyday and every night for her. I just dont understand what I did so wrong to make this happen to me. She was my baby. And all i have left are memories and some ashes. Im Broken inside and out. Ive started cutting again, and i just want to die. But i cant leave my baby Scotty even more alone. Without his mommy. </3

I know alot of people are going to read this and think ” Wow. This girl is making a big ass deal about her dead dog when i have even bigger problems than her” or some shit like that but to be honest i dont give a shit. This is just one of many problems in my life. It just so happens that out of all of them, this one hurts me the most. I saw her for 10 minutes maybe even 5 on that Tuesday. And thats all i’ll get to see her until i die. Which hopefully is soon but i cant do that to my poor baby boy.