I’m tired of been told that everything is going to be better, that when you hit bottom the only thing you can do is go up. Over the years I realize those things are just crap, are worthless for me. Nothing is better and I keep on falling. Sometimes I wonder what is to be happy, to not pretend that you are a normal person with a normal life. Why can anyone live according to what they personally believe, think and act? Why they have to label us as if we were a different kind of humans, and many times not even that. I think that if never actually get to kill myself I’ll never going to be a happy person, I’ll live eternally with this depression, with the urges of hurting myself, labeled as crazy.