This sucks. You love someone so much and they just hurt you, and you forgive them, and they do it again, so you forgive them and it happens again! Why do I have to be such a hopeless romantic. I wish I was one of those strong woman who don’t believe in love. Who can be on there own. But I am so damn needy. I can’t even sleep alone. I’m pathetic.
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Being alone sucks more.
I rather be alone. All of these stupid problems would be gone and I could just take care of my own problems. I have to many problems to add a problematic relationship into the mix.
Love is not a weakness. It takes courage and strength to love. It takes devotion and skill and patience. Staying alone is easy. Love is always hard.
You can’t rely on untrustworthy people. Forgive people, but don’t forget who they are.
Love is a special thing. Don’t waste it on people who don’t deserve it. Be brave enough to know you could get hurt but strive for happiness anyway. Be strong enough to pick yourself back up. Be smart enough to learn from your mistakes.
Engie, why did that make me cry? I don’t want to be with someone I can’t rely on or trust. He has so many problems… I know if I left him he would commit suicide and I couldn’t deal with having that hang over my head for the rest of my life… and I love him and wouldn’t want him to do that but I’m hurt and I don’t feel like I should have to deal with this anymore.
I’m sorry to hear this is happening to you. I’ve been through the exact same thing. Don’t feel obligated to stay with him if he guilt trips you by saying he’ll kill himself if you leave. I know how it feels. You’re mad and sad and you might even feel trapped, like it will be your fault if something happens to him. I know it’s hard, but you will need to tell him he needs to get help. I went through this, to fights where he told me he put a pistol in his mouth when he was jealous. Don’t let him get to you.
It’s not even that he guilt trips me or even brings it up. I just know him and I know that its what would happen if I break up with him and stick to it. I’m all he has… It’s so hard for me to think of myself.
Does he have no other friends?
I’m not going to pretend I know your situation or how he hurt you, and there’s no magic solution that’s going to fix every relationship problem and I don’t consider myself an expert. I mean, I’ve found a lot of pain and happiness, but I still have a lot to learn.
It sounds like you care an awful lot about him. I guess what I would do is ask myself what he would do if he felt the same way about you. Don’t forget that he keeps breaking his promises. Can you be happy knowing that’s not going to change?
Consider the sacrifice you’re making too. If staying with him is going to cause you a lot of pain, does he really appreciate that sacrifice? Is he worth the sacrifice?
Maybe have a serious controlled discussion with him about how you feel. Not a shouting match, because that won’t achieve anything. Try to figure out what is best for both of you.
But, like I said, I’m not an expert and I don’t want to pretend I know how you should approach this problem any better than you. Above all else, you have to trust yourself. No one else knows what you want better than you do. So you have to trust your own judgement.
Thankyou.