Suicide is the only constant in my life. It’s always been the thing that made sense. Living is torment and volatile and there’s only confusion. Wanting to die is the only thing I’ve ever been sure of. I just need a gun and a hotel room with a view. These things should be attainable right? Why the fuck can’t I get them? I’d love for someone to break into my house right now and kill me.
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You could buy both, you’re going to die anyway, so put it on a credit card. Or (better alternative) run away. As far as you can, and long as you can, and see what you find. maybe there might be hope for you after all, or maybe you will finally meet your demise as you have wished.
“Remember, only the _good_ die young” — Arnold J. Rimmer after kneeing death in the groin.
I have been on a quest to get a gun myself but im only 18 and where i live its hard to get a gun.
I’d love to run away. I’d love to just fuck off to some remote part of this country and live in isolation with vodka and wine as my friend. And that’s a great quote. I keep resetting the age I wanna die. It’s gone from 14, to 18 to 23 (based on a Jimmy Eats World song) to now 27 which is the age everyone seems to pop their corks, so to speak. So, never heard of this Arnold Rinmer guy but I like the way he thinks. As for me, I can’t tell whether or not I have a future but however this plays out, as history has taught me, I won’t last long. My mind is long fucked and I don’t think there’s a way out for me.
Yeah it’s hard where I live too. But then there’s all this talk about gun control and it’s like why can’t I live in America? Shit, why can’t you just walk into a gun store and have it be as easy as that and if anyone asks me why I can be like ‘yep I’d like to blow my brains out’. Yeah I wish it were that easy.
When I found out all I needed was $100 worth of items off the shelf, I felt like my prayers were answered. Today I got my balloon kit at Party City. To be honest, I was always worried about running away. I mean who wants to be giving BJ’s just to cop their next fix? For me it’s on to crafting my own escape, when all I’ll need to do is just sit back and breathe deeply.