You know what. After my friend and I made up yesterday I thought everything would be good. I walked into college today thinking “No getting depressed, this will be a new year and a good start” I went 2 minutes until people started bullying me. I had thought it would have stopped after I completely flipped and screamed at them last year.
So, first lesson – ICT, first thing that happened was I was pushed into the huge mother fudging computer, and they laughed at me and shouted “Emo boy gonna cry? Go cut yourself freak”. Well, I went into the boys loos after, and as you expected, I sliced up my arm again.
Break time – Literally, knives thrown at me, people saying “Emo” or “Fag” or “Go die already suicidal freak”. In the end, this resulted, back in the loos, cutting my thigh
Second Lesson – Free Lesson, tried going into the library to revise, and some kids in the older year stole my beanie hat, shoved it down their pants (or boxers, I don’t really wanna know). Then tried to burn it, but the librarian got it back, and shouted at me for being an idiot and letting them do it.
Third Lesson – Essentially just consisted of me listening to botdf (Blood On The Dance Floor) crying my eyes out for an hour.
Lunch – Basically, the same as third, only people in my year decided it would be fun to beat the crap outta me until I was crying my eyes out, and nobody who walked past seemed to give a crap.
Fourth Lesson – Music Tech, Drum sticks thrown at me, shouted at by the teacher for someone else dropping a microphone. I had my iPod stolen, and the piss taken out of all my music (Metal-core, metal, rock, pop punk, punk, and some electronic bands like brokenCYDE, Botdf etc)
Assembly – Was forced to sit in the corner cause everyone refused to sit next to me, and the teachers claimed it was me being awkward. and was taken the piss out of by my head of year with my music, he pretending to be the stereotypical “Emo” and pretended to cut himself, talked in the depressed accent, claimed to hate life, worship Satan, and love the color black.
Final Lesson – Music Tech (A different music teacher),watched my homework get ripped up by another student, and then when I explained to him why It isnt handed on (should be obviouse, he saw it getting ripped up) and shouted at me cause I should have thought about it getting ripped up, then gave me a detention for 30 mins.
Yeah, it doesn’t seem like much, most people are effected like this I know, but it hurt. A lot. I want to die, but I’m far to cowardly to attempt it. I’ve honestly started to give up, so much cutting is involved, I believe I may as well be dead.
7 comments
I’m so sorry you have to go through all of this:( I’m also made fun for listening to metal, but I don’t think i’d be here without it, really, it has saved my life.
Does this happen often at school?
Wow, that really sucks. I can’t imagine how anyone can live with themselves after treating another human being like they treat you.
I agree with somatic 🙂 Metal is awesome and socially not accepted engough 🙁 But I to woudn’t be here without metal xd Maybe you should cut down on the cutting though 🙁 Don’t want you to get an infection or something like that :s I know you can’t help it, it’s fine 🙂 You shoudn’t be dead, think of your friend.. She would be devastated If you left her like that 🙁
yes Ravanys i would cry for days and i don’t think i ever recover from doing these things and i would feel so bad for you of you leave
dude i am so sorry you have such a shit school. just know if i went to school with you i would be sure to beat all the fucking ignorant assholes up that gave you a problem (even though i’m really little haha)… the students at my school are just as ignorant and mean but lucky for me hardly anyone knows about my problems and if they do see my scars they just stare and dont say anything like the ***** bitches they are. I am really sorry you had such a horrible day and i really hope school gets better for you. although i cant hug you in real life here is a virtual hug and kiss from me your friend Sunflower <3 MWAHH!!!
I used to feel the same, people would bully me and I had no friends (it wasn’t as bad as your situation but it felt as bad) but then this new girl came to our school in our class, all of a sudden people were picking on her, I thought it was unfair and defended her and punched one of the bullies in the face, funnily enough we didn’t fight and no one told, me and her are good friends now and we both became more social. I realised for some reason I couldn’t stand up for myself but I could for others. I still don’t know why.
And I thought I was having it bad… listen mate, the best bit of advice any of us on these forums can give is talk to someone in power, in control, and your parents!! I go through a lot of these problems and I wanna help you, coz its not fair that the world picks on the good guys. Also, although it may seem hard, please stop with the cutting, that’s just fuel for them to light, so, yeah…
Don;t give up hope mate, it IS a new year, and things can’t get any worse, the only way is up! 🙂