I havent been on here in about a month. Mostly because Ive been trying to better myself. But things have gotten bad again. I think I might need help, because I cant control myself sometimes. And it makes me feel bad because I try so hard to. I just recently started punching things again. I want to do that right now actually. It makes me feel better. But I made a promise to someone I love that I wont. For some reason, I just want pure silence and to be left alone.
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Eh, I used to punch walls too. I actually just left the holes in the walls because there’s something comforting about the chaos. Whenever I fix the walls I seem to break them again, but when they are already broken I stop punching them. It’s my house so it’s not like I’m damaging someone else’s property.
In any case, I get that it makes you feel better but it’s a great way to break a knuckle/finger. Coming on here was a good idea because it can distract you while the rage dies down.
I’ve actually broke a finger doing it before lol… But I’m pretty calm now.
Glad to hear you’re more calm now. Those times of heightened anger/sadness are really hard. I have BPD so I turn pretty dysfunctional when I hit those extremes. I’ve never hurt anyone but I can say some pretty nasty things.
In any case, have you found anything that helps you? Talking? Sleeping? Distraction? Maybe keeping a punching bag around might help.
I punch things, smash things, destroy things all the time. When I can’t find anything to destroy, I cut myself.
You need to find a distraction method which works for you. I find classical music and deep breathing calms me down and puts out the fire that is raging within.
Also before harming myself I say, I’ll run a bath and then set to work, ‘sometimes’ by the time to the bath is full the feeling to harm ones self has completely passed.
You guys give some pretty good advice. And usually I try to do things to keep myself from being sad. Like reading and stuff. But rage is another story. I’m getting better at dealing with it though.