Tired of trying and it’s messing me up

My ex and I broke up about a month ago. And I know all of you are probably like its just a relationship and I can find another one. Well this one is really messing me up. Me and my ex had a really good relationship but then she broke up with me for like no reason and won’t tell me. We still talk like if we are ‘together’ but then she says we are friends. I guess now she tells me she has a girlfriend but when we were together she was against all that stuff. Which I don’t mind but she is like rubbing it in my face that she found someone and it was pretty quick after we broke up but I just don’t understand why she’s with a girl when she was against it. So on Friday my ex came over and we hung out and had like a really good time. It was better than I thought it would. So she ends up sleeping over at my house. And you know we are watching tv and I was using the remote and she takes it way from me and next thing I know we were like wrestling for it and just laughing and it was fun then all of a sudden she starts kissing me and all that and were making out. And I was actually really excited I was thinking to myself like wow we are getting back together and like I guess she missed me and I was really happy. Then all of a sudden right in the middle of it she asked “how do you like your birthday present?” And I said is it only a present and she said yes. So that kiss meant nothing to her and it was only a gift. Wow did that hurt me so much. Like I really want this girl back and she ends up doing that to me and then she keeps telling me every time I like try to cuddle with her that she has a girlfriend but yet she’s allowed to like hook up with me and not feeling anything while I’m here suffering without her and she’s making it worst by doing these things to me…