i want to run away
i just cannot stay
I don’t know what to say.
I just can’t sit and wait.
It has to happen
I swear it does
this is what’s right.
must. spill. blood.
I know you’ll be sad
but my life is bad.
it drove me mad.
I can’t stay sane.
I try to speak
but no one’s listening.
I can’t tell you why.
I can’t say goodbye.
I don’t wanna cry.
I just wanna fly.
So HI.
for the very last time.
hello!
I’m sorry I must go!
bonjour!
You’ll understand I’m sure!
Hola!
You won’t be sad for long!
Hey,
I’m sorry.
I swear,
you won’t miss me.
And if you do,
well then,
I do too.
I’ll miss feeling broken
I’ll miss feeling gone.
I’ll miss all the sadness.
no.
I’ll miss writing songs.
I’ll miss all my poetry.
I’ll miss all the notes.
I’ll miss all that meant something.
yes,
but it’s for the best,
eternal rest,
I’ll be glad I left…
Now i know this is hard…
but it won’t be for long…
now dear, if you miss me…
I wrote you songs,
I sung them too,
Just for you,
Now dear, don’t be blue.
You’ll move on
like most humans do.
It’ll be quick,
I’ll make it fast.
And I’ll tell you goodbye first…
but alas, alas.
I’ll miss you the most!
You were always inspiration
to my happy notes.
The ones of hope
not the ones of slit throught.
The ones of love,
my love,
I love you…
I need to run away
for I fear I cannot stay
I don’t know what to say…
But my soul has gone away.
and only a shell is left to see
hollow and drowning
in a pool of misery,
I hope you see clearly now,
that this death is not of greed,
it is and always will be,
meant to bring me glee,
So, if You still don’t get it,
then you never will.
But for now my dear darlings,
I’ve got a grave to fill…
***********************************************************
I got asked the other day of why I write songs and poems saying i’m going to kill myself and then the next day write another poem claiming again, that i’m going to kill myself. Well, here is why:
I am a smart girl, I know eventually life gets better, that there will be light admist the darkness, so, I hold on. My poetry and songs I write are simply a reflection of how I feel, I write them for everyone here, so that maybe they’ll read them and relate, and even feel better. Now, trust me, If I were to seriously express the ideation of carrying out my suicide, You’d know. I wouldn’t write an ordinary poem or song, I’d just post with a letter or something, or maybe not post at all…I’m getting away from the topic. anyways, I just wanted to clear that up so that people don’t start thinking that i’m a wimp and that i’m all talk and no walk.
Sincerely, Jacqueline. </3