I want to die, but I don’t want to fuck it up. Helium hood, pills, slit wrists, even asphyxiation with semi suspended hanging and other variations, drowning….so much can go wrong i don’t want to wake up in the hospital with my world in even worse ruins. I’ve been there 8 times to date. I’m done with that. I don’t want sympathy, empathy, anything, I just want to die. I can’t get a hold of a secure source for cyanide or ******** as they can steal your money and leave you dry–already lost hundreds that way. I don’t know what to do. No subways where i live, no high enough buildings, no bridges that would ensure a fatal blow. I am so upset that I am willing to do this at the expense of other’s peace of mind, but I have scrappled enough with this living so others can be happy, and I’m just done.
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6 comments
i know what you mean ive been the same im at the end just need to get some things in order
I’ve been this way for quite a while and my affairs and the like have been figured out. I just don’t know my sure way yet. Or I do, I just can’t access it which drives me crazy.
Well I’m feeling the same way. Living trust in place. I have posession of a couple of methods, just afraid of screwing up. Winding up in the psych ward ain’t going to happen.
You should be ok with a living will, though as long as it’s a sound method. My problem is that my father has a complete power of attorney and could override my living will.
i testet partial suspension hanging on the door with video, got unconsicous in 20 seconds… it really worked easily without the feeling of bumbing head… i just got to sleep without any pain. it works but not all time it worked so good… the problem is psychological, the life instinct is heavy… how do you overcome this instinct? best wishes 😉
I mean it’s cool that you blacked out…I often want a way to just escape it all. Blacking out is better than pill abuse or cutting. But the point is that the partial suspension didn’t kill you…I mean what went wrong and how can you get it to work?