“You kind of screwed everything up.â€
“You’re the problemâ€
“This is why we don’t want you here.â€
I don’t know how much more I can take. I’m trying my hardest to find peace and happiness. I’m trying to do what’s right for me, but that’s not a popular decision.
Last week I made the choice to leave the university I was attending for a community college near my home. I’m still going to become a nurse, it’s just a different path. I didn’t want to move back into my house, but my parents made me. I wanted to move in with my grandpa, he has an open apartment upstairs, but my parents said I had to move home so I did. In the few days I’ve been home I’ve already scheduled all my classes for the community college and I have obtained a job. I feel like I made the best decision for me. My sister’s and dad haven’t been very supportive. I hear them talking about how I’ve screwed everything up, about how I’m the problem, and they don’t want me here. Sometimes they say it to my face, sometimes behind my back, but it always cuts deep. They have no idea how many months I’ve dreamt of suicide. They don’t know that they are making this all a little easier for me to kill myself. Maybe then they’ll be happy. I screwed everything up. I’m the problem.
2 comments
What problem did you cause exactly? Because all I can imagine when I read your post is an intelligent, strong, independent person. The choices that you make is for your future only, not theirs. If this path makes you happy, then carry on!
And who cares if it’s not a popular decision? Popular isn’t always the best option. You’re bright, you’re young, you have the world in your hands 🙂 You can be anyone you want to be. Life has no rules, directions, or instructions. Life is not a game.
Maybe you could move in with someone more supportive, maybe your grandfather? You don’t have to move back with your parents, don’t let them make your decisions for you. You’re free to do whatever you want with your life.
I wish you the best, and study hard! 🙂
You are an adult ….parents no longer have commanding authority over you they can only make suggestions and give advice they can no longer force you to do anything….move into the apartment your grandfather has while it still is available….if it will remove you from those comments then they won’t continue to affect you…..you don’t have to subject yourself to stupid insults.