I’ve gone to different counselors on and off for a few years now. I’ve tried many times to open up and let the person help me, but I always end the sessions short of any progress because it just doesn’t seem to help. I have trust issues to begin with and I’m not open to sharing my story with just anyone. I always want to tell the counselor the absolute truth, no matter how harsh it is, but I always become too afraid. I don’t like the idea of someone being paid to care about me. I know that they chose their job for a reason and they have a passion for helping people, but I always feel so uncomfortable telling this complete stranger my problems. There have been times that I have sat through counseling holding back tears because I didn’t want to tell this person how much I hated myself, I didn’t want this stranger to know my secrets. I always feel a ton of pressure, like I have 45 minutes to tell this person everything I’m feeling. How do you break through that?
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I can see how its difficult to express your emotions to a total stranger. Its weird. Plus, whats with that time limit? It’s like you finally start talking and you have this close personal conversation and then all of a sudden, they cut you off and push you out the door. I too, also have trust issues however on here, feel free to rant. I promise you there is no time limit and on here, your identity is hidden. Theres no reason to be afraid
Aww thanks! Totally agree about getting into a conversation and then “alright then we will start here next session!” Makes it feel so forced and fake.
I am usually pretty open with the issues I have and have had…I tell people bc maybe I can help them not do something that I did. But this doesn’t help my pain…there is always more. Something new to worry about, someone I care too much about that hurts me, friends that hurt me, family, work or home issues…My plate is too full…So, I have the opposite problem. I will share my story, but it doesn’t make me feel better…no matter what I try to do, I always get hurt…and I’m tired of being hurt, feeling alone and sad. I am tired of not being enough, for myself or anyone else…
I haven’t seen a counsellor as such since I was a kid, but I have been “counseled” by my… superiors shall we say.
When I partake in said counselling, I literally let all my defences down and show them who I really am inside. It comes as no surprise that they are all shocked by who they then see in front of them. But for me personally, that’s the only way I feel I will ever get these demons outta me.
In short; counselling can and will help, if you are prepared to “stand down” your defences and let others in. The hard part is accepting there help and following through with it.
I still haven’t figured that last part out yet.
Seriously takes a long time to trust someone… Well for them to earn your trust. 1year of same therapist down, I’ll let you know how it goes next year if he doesn’t pawn me off on some other unsuspecting psycho babble twat.
I hear you… I have always been afraid to trust anyone, but thank god at least its nearly impossible for a counselor to get you locked up (unless, of course, you threaten harm to you or others.) So, I have always been leery, and the whole thing about them getting paid and the time limit… I get you.
Everyone on here seems very cool to me… open up if you like and talk to us. We understand.
I don’t like the fact these counselors can have you admitted for something you say. Sometimes I just want let out those thoughts in my head doesn’t mean I’m going to act on it…that’s why we talk to these people right? I never really trusted them enough to tell them everything, so to me I’m just walking in a circle….
I hope for you this may be a better avenue than paying someone that is going to tell you “you can tell me anything”, “but don’t tell me you are feeling suicidal