Not a damned day goes by I haven’t held the cold steel of my 1911 against my head smiling knowing if I pull the trigger ill finally be in hell but I think of the few people that do love me and I halt myself but I don’t think ill last much longer not once has a girl said yes not once have i felt love outside of family but if I can last this long my weak pathetic unlovable soul can carry on spit on pissed on beaten raped as a child by a monster that forced me to dress like a little girl then relentlessly fuck my asshole and call me a ***** kick the living shit outa me and laugh then anyone else can my will to live is about gone don’t be weak like me please for the love I have remaining please don’t end up like me don’t splatter your skull salsa across the sky live endure be strong where I am weak
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i wish being strong was easy like that. got rejected by a couple of girls this and past year. girls that i thought i had a great connection with. i know this shit aint nothing, but it kills me. doesnt help tthat i got fired a week ago, saw it coming,l..still hurts like a ***** though