Its 4 in the morning and I am crying. I cant stop. Its been so long since I have cried. Im only crying because this wasn’t how it was supposed to happen. This was not how things were supposed to work out. This isnt how my life should of happened.
I totally understand what your feeling. Never thought to be this person either. Think the things I think about. Doing the things I’m doing… But that’s the mistery of life, you never know what going to happen… And maybe we don’t always like it but just like bad things happen good things will also happen. Its never easy- but it makes you a stronger person. Makes you a person worth being alive.
I’ve become a very different person as well. I used to love life and now I’m so disenchanted by it. Thankfully I have a great set of friends and family that have been there for me (and I for them) through all the massive changes that have happened over time….but there’s little I’m living for.
I have big dreams and goals I wanted to achieve but I’m in my early 40s now and have less time to do those things. I also have no significant other which is a major problem for me but I think that’s an easier problem to solve than other issues I have.
I’m tired of struggling to get back in shape, to get a better job, to improve my life. It all seems so pointless. So what if I end up getting the things that I want, my youth is pretty much gone and I have little left to look forward to, except growing even older and more irrelevant. I was doing ok in my 20s and 30s and now it’s like there’s no reason to live at all.
I’m going to make one last effort to improve my life over the next couple of years. If I’m in much the same position I am today then I’m definitely checking out for good.
4 comments
I totally understand what your feeling. Never thought to be this person either. Think the things I think about. Doing the things I’m doing… But that’s the mistery of life, you never know what going to happen… And maybe we don’t always like it but just like bad things happen good things will also happen. Its never easy- but it makes you a stronger person. Makes you a person worth being alive.
I’ve become a very different person as well. I used to love life and now I’m so disenchanted by it. Thankfully I have a great set of friends and family that have been there for me (and I for them) through all the massive changes that have happened over time….but there’s little I’m living for.
I have big dreams and goals I wanted to achieve but I’m in my early 40s now and have less time to do those things. I also have no significant other which is a major problem for me but I think that’s an easier problem to solve than other issues I have.
I’m tired of struggling to get back in shape, to get a better job, to improve my life. It all seems so pointless. So what if I end up getting the things that I want, my youth is pretty much gone and I have little left to look forward to, except growing even older and more irrelevant. I was doing ok in my 20s and 30s and now it’s like there’s no reason to live at all.
I’m going to make one last effort to improve my life over the next couple of years. If I’m in much the same position I am today then I’m definitely checking out for good.
Sorry to hear that things are so difficult for you right now daisy. But please don’t give up hope. Things will get better.
thank you all. I feel better i got drunk tonight at a party with friends. I couldnt stop dancing it felt really good and i just feel warm and happy