Well fuck its been a while since I last posted something on here. Just another dose of disappointment and frustration, have no other way to vent but post it up. Because no one likes that sorta shit up on facebook! LOL
ANYWAYS, how is everyone doing? Great I hope, but by the looks of all these post. Not looking too flash atm huh? Don’t you wish you could just turn back time & change things only because you’ve disappointed yourself for the decisions that you’ve made and you don’t want anyone else to know? Yes, no…maybe? haha its is a terrible feeling, especially if you’re the kind of person who lives on regrets and bottle things up inside. I’m starting to think I’m that sort of person, though everyone knows me as the girl who brushes thimgs off easily, doesn’t worry too much about things & is laid back. That’s just a front!
In all honesty, I wish I could just sleep & not wake up. Witnessing other peoples lives, how happy they are and stress-free. It kills just a tad inside! Pretending  that everything is okay, but you yourself know that its terrible. Make it worse, being a student in University! The grades, pressure and stress you have to deal with; sure its like every other student but surviving for 3 years of uni. Pretending that studies ain’t a problem, thank God you’re passing. & you can’t drop out because you know you’d be out cold in a ditch somewhere! You feel like you’re the only person in the world who is going through this shit, but you’re not. Obviously, because no one talks about it. I mean who would? No one understands, & its the most difficult shit to explain to someone. At this point I just want to shut everyone out, I wish I could just drop out of uni & run away. Escape all the bullshit, but I know that can’t happen! Family & friends will think I’m crazy or just being a drama queen. ahhhhhhhh I wish I could just change things, clueless to what is going on. & is this really what I want in life?
zzzz okay that looks like a lot of words, I think I’ll stop before I write up a novel. haha
Toodles beautifuls xo
2 comments
Kia ora.
I’m alright, thanks for asking. Having a jam session on the guitar, playing some Six60 and a few reggae tracks. Nothing fancy, just another night I s’pose. Keep going at your studies and best of luck with becoming a nurse, correct? Anyway, hope you enjoy your evening too and do take care out there in the big scary world 🙂
Well thats good, nice to hear you’re doing great (: Peeerfect night, how can no one listen to Six60 on a Saturday like this. Thank you thank you, & yes a nurse is the aim. To be honest wasn’t expecting a kiwi to post a comment! Thanks again, make sure to have an epic night tho 😀