What the hell is wrong with me? I wrestle in my mind constantly, “I need help. You have access to it but you need to make the first step.” “No, you don’t need help. What makes you think you are worth getting help for anyway? You are just being stupid. Suck it up, nancy.” It’s a constant struggle and I don’t know who to listen to.
I know in the end, that, that is going to be the final decision…the end. The anxieties I feel every day contribute to more and more problems. I just cannot gain control over my life. Hell…I can’t even gain control over myself. I just don’t know where to turn or who to trust and even if I did…the demons I hold inside would never let me go.
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You are worth the help, and do not believe you are stupid. You know you need the help, you have the access to it, so take it. Listen to thoughts that only benefit and care for you.
Tell that voice that belittles you to take a hike and they are not worthy to be part of someone great. Tell them to suck it up be ease your not going to take anymore from them.
Utilize the resources so you can learn to cope and overcome these anxieties that cause you problems in life. Do not let them have any more control, fight and take back your life so can start living again. You may right, the demons may never let go, but then again you can always duck tape their mouths shut, handcuff them and throw them under the bed.
I wish you the best of luck, you deserve the chance to gain back control. Take care.