I tried to commit suicide for the third time on Friday 15th August 2014.. I took 36 quetiapine and it obviously didn’t work because I’m here to tell the tale. I was admitted into newbridge house mental health unit where i was sectioned and I discharged myself yesterday afternoon as soon as I was taken off the section.. I am currently under home treatment and they put up the dosage of my medication.. What I’m trying to say is that I never stop thinking about wanting to die.. Or should I say I’m told to die.. In my head I never hear ‘I’ want to die its always ‘you’ deserve to die.. I know one day I will do it right and I can’t wait for the day I leave this earth I’m just sick of being here. Breathing and crying when I wake up every morning purely because I’m still here.. Will I ever live a normal life? Or will I always feel this way?
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8 comments
Hey! Youre not alone you know…i hate my life…my family doesnf care about me and i too wish i could just die..youre not alone. Lets be friends
I don’t have a mom and dad or brothers or sisters is there a way to private message on this site as I’m new today? Would be good to talk to you x
i know how you feel….
Perhaps things will change but I’ve spent the last twenty odd years wishing I was gone, sometimes I do feel better and other times I feel pretty awful and just recently I feel worse than ever, I struggle to keep going and don’t know why I bother to do so, you’re definitely not alone.
I’m glad I’m not alone although I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.. The doctors told me I’m bipolar but now are unsure they think I have psychotic depression lol the scariest thing is its not just me I have these thoughts about.. I have doctors come out to my house everyday.. I’m 21 and have felt like this from 14 years old.. 20 years is a long time to feel that way and I hope things change for you.. I would like to get better and feel ‘normal’ again although I’ve forgotten what that feels like lol do you have a diagnosis?
A better diagnosis to feel normal again would be having some friends who understand you? To let you, and others who’re reading this, know we have a skype group of SPians. (text based use only) You need somebody to share your feelings with, tell us whatever is going on with your life, some banter, some friends? We’re there for you people! We already have 20 people in the group and it literally is good to connect with them. It lets you escape the loneliness, even if only for a short period of time, depending on how much you interact with others.
Give us a shout if anybody would like to join, you won’t regret it.
@done12354 Do I just search for the name Spians on Skype? I’d like to join…
I might not talk much but just knowing there’s people to turn to in my times of turmoil might do me some good. If there is a PM function on this website, I’ve yet to discover it. Just joined but time to explore
Well the group name is SPians, yep. But you need somebody in your skype friend list, who’s already in that group, to add you there. (To you or anybody else who doesn’t have a skype friend in that group, you could add me: span.95)
And no worries, once you get familiar with the guys, you’d like to be actively engage in the conversations. See you (and others wanting to join) there!