I’m just sick of this life. I don’t want to go to school and get bullied everyday, I don’t want to be poor anymore, I don’t want so many things to happen… But they do.
Cause this is life. Life sucks. Maybe not everybody is meant to wait for their ending, maybe some of us need to take care of that earlier. Which I’ll do.
Some background info. I’m 15, bad looking, anorexic (92 pounds) and poor. Been bullied last year of school in 9th grade and dropped out of school because I couldn’t stand it anymore… Now I’m into one of the worst high schools in city and being bullied again because of my weight so for the 2nd week I’ve sit home. I sit alone inside of some kind of shelter for poor, don’t know how to name it, where it’s cold and I got nothing there, sleeping on a plain floor.
I’m also a gamble addict, I can’t stand myself to play all my money on sports betting..Tried to talk once to my parents about this and my dad beat me instead of what I was expecting that he’d talk to me… Oh, and my dad, a alcoholic scumbag who doesn’t cares about me and drinks pretty much all of his money, being drunk and insulting me all time…Fuck that.
Suiciding is my last option. I can’t think of something else right now. I’ve been thinking about running away from home, I know I can live better by that, but I need money for it. I need to buy a tent and all the other stuff…So it’s a dead end.
I’ve tried suiciding once but didn’t have the balls to do it. This time I will. I don’t know how yet. Any ideas?
I don’t approach suiciding as I option I choose but as my only options. If you guys know any other way of getting over this..It would be nice. If not, tell me what’s your idea of method since I want to be 100% sure I’ll success. Bye..