my saviour

religious nuts. thats what i said to him when i saw some preechers on the streets. im 17. i used to be mildly religious, i used to pray and be conscious of my sins, then at 13 my innocents was robbed ironicaly my cross pendant that i wore permenantly broke in the process, i kept the truth to myself but it slowly ate away at me, destroying any faith i had, leading me down a dark hole of depression. then i met sam again, after 3 years of just saying hey down the corridoor. he caught site of my scars and fresh cuts, he opened up about his religion and we talked, i told him- the first person ive told what actuarly happened. he helped me plan what to do to get out of the situation i was in now. he was so calm and at peace, so wise for this age,( 15) and understanding. when i got anxious or started thinking he pointed out how i grabbed my neckless and fiddled with it against my lips. even i didnt realise that i did it, as if he already knew me better than me. i got home and thought about what he had said, i felt wierd, like i had been blessed by talking with him, that now is the time that im ready to accept help. i found my pendant and a new chain, i now wear it again permenantly. i picked up my bible and read. i prayed. i want to have faith, i want to feel. i think hes going to help. he said ive found god, that i have an angle on my shoulder again… but it sure doesnt feel that way yet.