This is one of those nights

Likewise-I know the feeling. Although I live with my mother-have some family and friends, I still feel quite alone (probably cause I’m single).

I never felt this way on a persistent basis in the past-I was pretty content with life and took everything in stride. I think I felt that the future had a lot of good things in store for me and this was just a passing moment (this was how I thought in my 20s and 30s).

Now that I’ve gotten to the ‘future’ (in my 40s) I find there’s nothing there and I’m still struggling along as before, it’s left me with feeling very dissatisfied with life. Most of all though I think we desire to find love with another person and when you don’t get it, then you become further disillusioned with living-it seems very pointless after a while.

Fortunately in my case, I don’t experience depression on a regular persistent basis as some do which is why I haven’t been more serious about ending my life. But at the same time my current situation is also untenable.

There is someone who I might start dating soon-she’s attractive and has other good qualities but doesn’t excite me as girls in the past have done. I live for that rush-makes life worthwhile, but it’s still better than being alone, which is why I’d date her. Life goes by so fast that you barely have time to take advantage of the good things it offers you-till they’re gone, then you realize you acted too late and you’ll never get those chances again.

I really regret not taking more risks, especially in dating.