Sometimes I feel like you’re just with me because you’re loney and need someone to talk to when it comes to you, but when I need you, you’re not there for me you just say, oh, I’m sorry, but then theres times I feel like you’re actually with me for me but that’s very rare now.. Like when you get mad that i don’t reply or call but that’s because I’m doing something or helping someone but you still get mad regardless which is something I don’t understand but you can do it to me and not expect me to get mad or cry.. i worry more than you think i just don’t show because I don’t want you to think im unhappy im just kinda bummed out that you don’t do the same for me? It’s just like when you get mad that i cut myself, why do you get mad when i do it but when you smoke i dont tell you anything? Because i cant ask the person i love if i can hurt myself like you do me because i know how it feels to be high and not feel anything anymore, so of course you’ll say no.. why can’t i do what helps me when im hurt but you can? Why do you get to have someone to vent to about your parents but i don’t? It’s so fucking sad that i have to run to my friend about it and then them ask what does hil think about it and i hate having to tell them that i don’t wanna tell you because you always just ignore what i tell you. And i just fucking hate it because then they tell me that “look you guys aren’t serious. You don’t know what she really want or if she’s just playing with you” and i hope and pray that you’re not because im done being played with done having my heart broken over and over. I really do love and care about you. But i just dont know if you feel the same..
(Please don’t comment on my relationship it’s in an odd patch at the moment. I just wanna rant, yanno?)
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