Nothing bad happened. I spent it in good company, out of the house and doing things..
I just felt this cloud over my head all day. I felt dead and hollow inside, like a tree struck twice by lightning and left to rot away…
I felt the urge to scream and just run into traffic, or climb to the roof of the mall and throw myself off…
It was a good day. I just felt like dying. And now I’m home.. All I want to do is curl up in a ball, wrapped tightly in my favorite blanket to hold myself together and pray I stop breathing or something.
I had a good day, all things considering I was internally contemplating my own death…
2 comments
I understand how you feel. Sometimes I just get in bed until the middle of the afternoon and I wish i could just stop breathing. . Sometimes life is just too much to take. Another day, more pain, more feeling alienated from everyone. It is so draining. I wish I had some encouragement to offer. But all I can say is what has become my mantra here. Please let’s just keep tryingtohope that things will get better.
I’m trying. God knows I’m trying. I gotta believe somewhere that things will get better…