Lmi has “gone west”

(Perhaps you knew here under the email pseudonym “Lara Howel”)

She took her life earlier this week. The crushing pain, agony, and loneliness was too much. She is no longer in pain.

While she didn’t talk much here. She lurked and read most posts over the past 5 years. I know she reached out to many here as she did with me. She lifted my spirits, was there for me in many of my darkest moments. I cared for her a great deal. To my knoweldge, she didn’t say goodbye, at least to me. She asked at one point, and I told her, the worst thing would be to call and never have her pickup. (in talks with her parents, it was too painful to ask if she left a note)

I talked to her until 4 a.m. the night before. She was down, but promised me she wouldn’t do anything that night.

I will miss our witty conversations the most. I wish I could have just one more.

I don’t know if she would have wanted us/me to hang in there, or join her. I could end it now. However, in the wise words of Spock, “Tomorrow, will do, even better”.

You will be most missed beautiful girl.

In tears,
-Ceph