Suicide is like this 2 edged sword thing. Whenever I hear that a person died by suicide its like this for me. On one hand you pretty much know that their suffering in this word is over and perhaps maybe they are free from that now. On the other hand whenever I hear that a person committed suicide its also a sad thing because you know that they did it because their life really sucked and they wanted out. So you have to wonder for how long did their misery go on and what level was it at before they ended it. I don’t know this is just my thoughts on how I feel about other peoples suicides. Ultimately I always want to see people happy and live…. but I respect peoples choices and have respect for those who have passed away.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
8 comments
I have lost several friends to suicide in real life. I usually didn’t see it coming. The first one shredded me. I couldn’t help but think it should have been me, not him. Over the few months that followed I realized we used the same defense methods so that others wouldn’t know how we felt, and that I had felt how others would feel if I did it. That was an eye opener. It was at least 10 years ago, but I still miss him and the way he brightened the day of anyone around him. I see a lot of physical and emotional pain through my work; I couldn’t agree more, suicide is a double edged sword. It cuts some free and stabs others abruptly in the heart. I guess that’s why I haven’t done it. I sure have thought about it enough.
It puzzles me why suicide is such a bad thing sometimes. I used to work in the field of mental health and substance abuse an it was all hands on deck when someone was suicidal. Especially actively suicidal. But it was more a liability thing for the agency than compassion. Letting someone actively suicidal leave the clinic was grounds for dismissal and/or no protection from the agency against being sued for wrongful death if the person went through with it.
Still I was positively driven to save everyone from themselves back then. Now? Not really so driven to save people as to allow people to just find thier own way in life. Folks in the mental health field will committ someone then that is the end to it pretty much. I think to myself “so what now? Who is going to give this person reason to live? Who is going to be this person’s reason to live? It certainly isn’t themselves. So what now?”.
And that is really my struggle. It isn’t the “lockem up to keep em safe” idea it is the “What Now?” that no one addresses. loading someone with all kinds of drugs is a band aid on an ongoing underlying issue that at best will be able to be addresse by the individual and at worse will never be addressed on any lever ever in their lives.
So what now? That is always my question. I’m holding your hand but what now? Do you need me to let go of your hand (controversial as that may be) or do you need me to just keep holding your hand. Because I don’t have any answers aside for what works for me. And I don’t even know why what works for me works for me. Or how it works.
So what now?
So true. There is an irony to it. The irony gets worse when you see the way people who are physically at the end of their rope, too messed up to “live an acceptable life” are treated. So we don’t actively kill them, but we can make decisions based on what will let them die faster. But if someone’s pain is emotional, even if it’s a trauma just as real as getting hit by a car and left brain dead… if they are left as incapable of “living an acceptable life” as the man whose brain is disconnected from his body inside his neck, we lock them up so they have to endure it longer. Some places offer some psychotherapy, but in reality, that generally takes years to work. So, truly, what now? What will let them not suffer through those years? I sure don’t know.
Yes. So what now?
Keep breathing and trying to make a life that you can enjoy living. At least that’s what I’m doing. I figured if I’m stuck alive, I might as well make it worth it.
Thank you both for contributing to the post. Yeah… I agree that the best corse of action for life in general is to TRY and make life as best as you can for yourself and try to live as long as you can and have the best life that you can. Its the only thing that makes sense. But there are some pretty big issues that people can wind up with and that is one sad part of life.
Suicide is sad…. but its something that happens to people in certain circumstances.
There is a third view on suicide. The ones left behind. Either it is a family or friends. Death always hurts people who are close to deceased and I believe it hurts even more when it’s a suicide. Many questions left unanswered. Why did he or she did it and if anyone could prevent it. In my case family is the only reason I’m staying around. Can’t do something that will hurt them for the rest of their lives.
Come to the dark side. We have sleeping bags!