Oh god, I know I’ve failed. They told me the contents of the test and I studied really hard those, but they didn’t ask anything of that!! Just a lot of number theory, and God I know I’ve failed, I’m so dumb! I wanted to post this after the results came, but I know I failed, I’m sure of it.
My only reason to live now makes me suffer. Don’t get me wrong, it’s pure and beautiful, but those are the exact reasons why it pains me. I’m trash, that thing is so beautiful, I’m just a filthy person that doesn’t deserve these beautiful things. Everyone else who enjoys it is so skilled and beautiful. I’m useless and can’t even do anything for it because I don’t have time. I feel envy. I’m crying a lot lately.
August 15 is so near. It seems I’ll do it this year. I feel sad because I’ll die without knowing everything I wanted to know, and I can’t even do anything about it. But I just can’t take it anymore. I have no hope left.
I’m so sorry guys, I failed you too.
5 comments
When do you get the results? You should at least wait for that before deciding anything. You probably didn’t do as badly as you think you did.
I’m not sure of that last comment, but yeah, I’ll wait. They are supposed to arrive in this upcoming week, not sure what day. What I’m afraid is that if I failed they won’t send anything and I’ll be waiting anxiously ):
Thanks for your words! <3
What’s you’re only reason to live?
I’m so so sorry, I cannot tell you. It’s pretty pathetic and small, nobody knows about it, and I feel like if I tell anyone I’ll be harshly judged. Thanks for asking anyway <3
Well good luck, I hope you did better than you think. I don’t think anyone would judge you harshly here. It doesn’t matter if it’s something that most people would not understand or appreciate. It just matters that it has so much meaning to you. All any of us can do is find our own meanings and reasons for living.