I’m dying because i have been 2 depressed for 2 long to create a life worth living. I’m also too depressed to deal with every day. At least 10 to 30 things happen or are mentioned that cause intense emotional pain. This the world ive occupied my entire life. My suicide is a mercy killing. Ive been on this site off and on 5 years. I’ve been horrendously depressed since a child. I’d be lying if i said i was completely fearless about it. But i also see no motivation to continue living. Im out of lies to tell myself. I cant accept the pain of waking up and living every day. I am physically ugly emotionally fraile and socially irrelevant. I have no redeeming aspects of my past present or future. I have given everything ample time to pan out. I am incapable of causing a livavle tolerable life for myself. I just hope this isnt another false finish that i have to continue through.
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40 hours left? Are going to kill yourself?
I haven’t a clue if i will given how many times ive tried before but that is the current plan
How are you going to do it?
Why do you think that suicide is an act of mercy? Are you sure that the afterlife is better? Don’t you even believe in an afterlife? Can you define nothingness? Did you know that any type of suffering is a situation where you feel some degree of emptiness? You suffer when you don’t feel whole, when you loose touch with yourself. So if you see the afterlife as nothingness what can guarantee that that nothingness is not painful? Can you imagine your life without suffering?
I understand your life. It’s really hard. As a matter of fact, I am not even really against your decision to commit suicide although I would be glad to convince you otherwise.
But why to believe that somehow by a miracle, suffering ceasses after death? Why not to embrace hell here on earth?
Did you know that some important religions believe that life on earth is a great opporunity to overcome inherited suffering and become much better?
Why not to give life another chance? You say that you are ugly. And I am beautiful. Guess what? I am still a virgin and I never had a girl friend. I used to have no friends as well.
You are a fat. And I am too thin… I look quite weak. And I had many problems because of that.
Yet, I continue to live. I continue to evolve spiritually. I embrace my suffering. I embrace my hell.
And guess what? Better days indeed came in my life. I feel much better now than one month ago or two years ago.
And I also forgot to mention that I am dead inside too.
I don’t believe there is an after life i also know that if it is i will see it eventually. If the afterlife is a meritocracy than there is reason to believe the longer i love the more likely i am to add to the negative side of that. Im bitter and angry. That is no longer how i feel but what i am. Suicide happens if there is a higher being there is no doubt that it knew my suicide to be a likely event. I believe I’ll just sleep i could be wrong but suffeeing for another 50 years wont change my experience in it.
@tragedyofjohn bullet to the brain when jumping off a bridge.
Why jump off a bridge? I would you just use the gun. Do u even have one?
I don’t have one yet. I just want to be sure the job is done. I am debating holding off though.
If there is something on the other side , i hope we meet someday . I wish you luck and peace , brother / sister .
Lol im a guy same to you
I can sort of relate. Except that I’m probably a lot younger than you. Some people tell me I have a lot going for me. I wish I could see what they see. Because I find it hard to believe. Besides, it doesn’t matter, if I’m socially inept. Life for the most part, is meaningless. I’ll also most likely be alone for the rest of my life. So everything to me seems pointless.
If you’re younger than me (ill be 29 in 2 months) and have anything going for you(i really do not) please at least try. If you have people at all in your life please keep trying please.
I’m eighteen. I did try. I’ve tried therapy, medication, and even a program. I wasn’t strong enough to stick the program out. But I was able to quit my cannabis addiction surprisingly. As for people, I have my parents and that’s it. I’ve been severely depressed since I was eleven. I’ll always be depressed and useless. Not only am I genetically predisposed to depression, but I also have ADHD. Which makes me even more susceptible to depression. I think people realize I’m depressed and just say nice things to cheer me up. Besides, I’ve grown to hate this world anyways.
How can you say you have 40 hours left when you didn’t even buy your gun already?
Because I will buy it tomorrow