Going Back to Therapy and Thinking About It

Hello. So I got my doctor’s referral today. It’s some psychiatrist in the next town over. I really hope the wait isn’t that long for appointments. I despise waiting rooms. I’m trying to remember when I first started to feel it. The pointlessness to it all. I think back to when I was in elementary and remember that I never really had any questions about my purpose. I never really thought about how there really is no point to this daily cycle. Middle school was rough. I think I was more concerned about having few friends who were willing to put up with me and things like relationships. I never understood any of it. For the most part though, I still went on with my life like there was some sort of meaning to it. Then I got into high school. That’s when it changed. The thing is, I don’t remember exactly when it changed. It was like one day I was fine and then the next I wasn’t. It’s like it just showed up in my head and presented itself as if it was there all along. Bit of good news though. Turns out she is gay. Don’t need to worry about asking her out anymore I guess. Back to not thinking about such pointless things anymore. You never really realize how slow things are until you think about time. It appears to be long, but when you are made unconscious of it, it doesn’t really stick around all that long. I think that’s all I have to say for today. Thanks for listening if you are.