Hi. I’m new here. I found the site about a week ago, and I decided to join today. I’ve been depressed since the age of 7 (after my parents divorced and my dad’s girlfriend abused me), and I’ve had severe generalized anxiety disorder since the age of 15. I’m a 20 year old girl. I tried to take my life for the first time last April and again in early May, both by overdosing on ibuprofen. I got myself into counseling, and lied to myself that I was fine. I got on anxiety/depression medication. God knows why, but I stopped taking it in August. Flash forward to November 7th, I tried to end it again by cutting my neck. I’m really bad at killing myself, I guess. If that didn’t work (which of course it didn’t), I had a backup plan. To drive my car into a bridge support. I was too much of a coward to do that. I was also planning on driving to a bridge I knew had worked for someone a couple months before. I was too much of a coward to do that, too. I told my parents, again, and moved back into my moms house. I went to a month and a half intensive outpatient program (IOP) 3 hours a day, 5 days a week, for 6 weeks. That… helped. But now, I’m back to my old suicidal self. I was thinking to maybe get a gun and end it on my 21st birthday (7 months away). Hmm. Anyway, I hope I’m welcomed here.
Welcome to the website! I’m 2 months away from my 21st birthday and I already bought my shotgun. Don’t feel bad that your bad at killing yourself, we all are. Otherwise we wouldn’t be here. Life seems to just be one big pile of shit.
What state do you live in?
I can’t get a handgun until I’m 21 :_(
Also, how do you kill yourself with a shotgun. Have a really long arm?
It’s actually pretty easy with a smaller shotgun. Also, I live in Florida.
Welcome to the SP.
I’m also a 20 yr old girl and I can pretty much relate to what you are going through.
Welcome to SP.
And I understand your pain, and I know you don’t want to go to counselling, but when ever you need/what someone to talk to, we are all here to help and support.
I’m glad your suicide attempts failed maybe your supposed to be in this world for a reason and I also think most of my anxiety n depression is caused by the trauma from my family