Most days, I just feel shitty for no reason. I never really want to leave my house, but I do when my friends force me to go out because I don’t want them to think anything is wrong. When I’m out, things seem pretty fun, but there’s always this underlying feeling of anxiety or sadness. I feel like I’m moody and upset for no reason all the time. I can’t focus/ don’t really care about most things anymore, but I just force myself to go to class or hang out with people. I feel like a failure at everything right now: in school, where I used to be a 4.0 student, I’m struggling to get Bs and Cs, emotionally, I’m all over the place, physically, I’m gaining weight and always slow/drowsy, and socially I just feel like I can’t make friends/ don’t have the energy to interact with the ones I have most of the time. People would probably prefer to hang out with someone prettier and with a better personality anyway. I just feel pretty damn useless, and I don’t know what’s wrong or how to fix it. I just don’t want to have to do anything anymore.
3 comments
I’m no expert, but you mention some of the symptoms of depression. Have you seen a doctor? The lack of interest, feelings of anxiety, loss of interest. They sound very familiar to those of us dealing with depression and anxiety.
Yeah, sounds like that, or heavy sedation caused by medication.
You might be developing a mental illness (young adulthood is prime time for that), or you might just be in a rut.